i have a few weddings to go to over the next several months.
all of them are couples who have been living together for a while....so, they don't really need presents for their 'house'.

anyone have any DIFFERENT sort of neat ideas for wedding gifts?

just go with what they register for

Check their register.
That's the stuff they want/need.
I know that when Sharon and I got married we were always damn happy to get a gift that was on the register.

That's why the exist.
Of course, I understand your desire to do something "special", but trust me and (unless you happen upon something amazing that you know they will go berzerk over), get them what they want.

one of the couples has no plans to register.
i guess that's the one that has me most stumped.
(it's my best friend. so i already know that there's nothing they really need.)

ok. and....another question.... how am i supposed to know where they are registered? aren't they supposed to put that in their invitation? is it rude to ask them?

(i feel really stupid about this. but i've actually not been to many weddings that weren't 'family'....my friends are all just now starting to get married.)

Super deluxe Salt and Pepper shakers - these have been my staple wedding gift when I don't like things on the registry for years now.....and I've had a TON of positive feedback on them - a lot of times when people open them they are like "WTF??" but months and years later when people have put away their fancy dishes and other wedding gifts they still use these regularly.

you should ask - it is rude to announce where you are registered

If you can afford it, buy 'em gift certificates for his & her spa treatments. I've also created a "Breakfast in Bed" gift and included champagne, couple of flute glasses with matching cloth napkins, breakfast tray, non-perishable goodies -- be creative. How about a "Picnic for Two" theme? I've done that too.

Nowadays a lot of couples have little webpages on wedding sites that has all that information, especially The Knot.com(mine is still up there which is really funny to look at every so often). Find out if they have one, they usually tell you info about the wedding itself and where the couple may be registered.

If not, then just try and contact someone else who may be in the bridal party or a close relative of whichever half of the couple you're closest to.

But Todd is dead on, I used to be excited beyond belief when I could see people were purchasing things off our registry. They're there for a reason.

Otherwise, Cash/check in card is ALWAYS the best gift. TRUST ME!! It's never looked at as bad.

well, my best friend said she didn't have any plans to register. so, that's why i'm especially stumped with her. (and i can't imagine not wanting to register. but whatever. it's her choice.)

and, aural....great idea! i love that. i could totally get creative with something like that!

money is a great idea as well. i will probably do that as my last resort....as i like to buy gifts.

chrome....what is 'super deluxe salt and pepper shakers'? what is it about them that makes them so great?

there were some people in from NJ (Philly suburb) and NY (Long Island) two weeks ago and they were telling me that no one "registers" where they live and that the rule of thumb is that you "fill your plate" when determining how much money to give (i.e. - if you think your meal cost $100, you give at least $200). I'm from the south, where EVERYONE registers, so this was a completely new concept for me. Do any of you live in an area where you "fill your plate" as the wedding gift?

(PS - Get what is on the registery. Di and I got married three months ago and we nearly everything, plus a few gifts that people "thought we would like" that were completely off base and unusable.)

people out here just register.

the weird things I found out about when getting married in the south:

1. the woman takes her maiden name as her new middle name...wtf?
2. the groom's father is often the best man...wtf?

1. My mother did that and she's a Yankee Jew.
2. wtf, indeed. But kinda nice, too.

Nah, those people are full of shit. Everyone still registers...how else would Great-Aunt Sadie know what to get you? And the "fill your plate" idea sucks. You don't throw a wedding to recoup your costs. A Saturday night wedding in NJ usually is way more than $100 per person, and I still think $200 is alot to give as a gift.

And DayStar, here's an example of a real nice salt/pepper set:
http://www.nambe.com/shop/SearchResults ... ers&page=1 that what you're referring to, Chrome?

Yeah, what Gordo said.

Miss Manners would roll over in her grave if she heard that one.

That's actually one of those silly, gen Y Bridezilla type things to say and do. No one I know actually would think that.

Yes it's nice to get a gift(though we had a couple of my dad's obscenely wealthy friends/business partners not give us one and my dad was annoyed) and if fact I just received a late one from a friend yesterday(8 mos later lol).

The gift does NOT have to equal the amount of the plate at dinner(that's fucked up I say, because not everyone is wealthy-you may as well not invite your friends and just invite business contacts if that's the case).

Anyone who says otherwise is full of crap and should just charge an admittance fee at the door because that's basically what they're doing.

Hahaha - I'm a cliche!!!

Diane Marie Schuetzeberg is now Diane Schuetzeberg Hance.

My Dad was my best man in our wedding in March - I'm 34 and he and I are very, very close. We play golf a couple of times a week, talk on the phone a couple of times a day, work together, etc.

At 24, it might have been different, but at this point in my life, it makes a whole lot of sense to have my Dad be my best man.

--- OH - and just FYI, the "fill the plate" comment was from a 45 year old life-long Long Islander and NYCPD Sgt.

Well, "Super Deluxe Salt and Pepper Shakers/Mills" don't really describe one type, but rather something fancier than someone might ever think of getting for themselves. This is not to mention how much better fresh ground pepper and sea salt taste than your typical salt and pepper fare.

Here are some ideas:

While the pictures above are just 2 differnt salt/pepper mill you could buy 2 of the same mills - one for pepper, one for salt as the actual mechanics of both are the same



You can buy acryilic grinders like I have above, or you can buy metal ones like I have listed below....also the one below is a salt shaker and pepper grinder - you may find some people who prefer just a normal salt shaker vs a sea salt grinder..to each their own

While I proposed some different ideas above I can assure you that I'd $hit myself(in a good way) if I got any of those shakers for myself as a gift....they are really nice - and that's kind of the point I was trying to make - any sort of more elegant grinder/shaker is going to be nicer than the stuff people have at home and they will probably end up using them A LOT...that's been the feedback that I've gotten from a number of people who I've gifted them to.

Finally, while I loved our gift registry when we got married recently and because of it we got some things we ordinarily might not have gotten I must admit that some of our favorite gifts were items that were NOT on the registry because we didn't know they were coming.

buy her a chia head as punishment for not registering.

OK, i just got married 2 weeks ago and had tons of shit on my registry. A bunch of people gave us a bunch of shit that was not on our registry and while nice (and expensive) it's stuff that
a. is totally not my taste
b. I will never use
c. I CAN't RETURN

so let me tell you what the best gifts are

CASH
registry is 2nd

give $100 or $50 or whatever. The couple can use it to go out or towards their home or whatever (or towards buying the shit they needed and didn't get but they got 5 antique plates...)

people think they're giving you something unique and memorable but really it's not what you want...sorry, I was on a tear about what to do with all this stuff (ebay) last night