Oh No! Tom and Katie pregnant.

mutty · **Posted:** Thu Oct 06, 2005 12:33 pm

HaqDiesel Wrote:

neuroboy Wrote:

so, read the headline. the soon-to-be-messed-up-fucking-kid is due 6 mos. after they started dating? hmmmmm. . .

"Katie is pregnant," but still no word on who did it.

Immaculate alien conception. The new messiah will come to deliver the scientologists unto their paradise.

Kabob · **Posted:** Thu Oct 06, 2005 1:36 pm

Max Wrote:

HaqDiesel Wrote:

neuroboy Wrote:

so, read the headline. the soon-to-be-messed-up-fucking-kid is due 6 mos. after they started dating? hmmmmm. . .

"Katie is pregnant," but still no word on who did it.

Immaculate alien conception. The new messiah will come to deliver the scientologists unto their paradise.

Shit! I better jump on that boat with a quickness! Hey, Rads.... send me all your back issues?

el_scorcho · **Posted:** Thu Oct 06, 2005 4:05 pm

Katie is pregnant. I hate it when people say that men are pregnant or when couples say "we" are pregnant. Pregnant means you got a baby growing inside you. Men can't do that.

mutty · **Posted:** Thu Oct 06, 2005 4:06 pm

But Tom has evolved beyond mere male-female sex...

huskerpunk · **Posted:** Thu Oct 06, 2005 4:14 pm

I hope their kid needs Ritalin.

DumpJack · **Posted:** Thu Oct 06, 2005 4:17 pm

huskerpunk Wrote:

I hope their kid needs Ritalin.

That would be awesome. Some little jumpy hyperactive fucker.

Evil Dr. K · **Joined:** Mon Oct 25, 2004 11:51 am **Posts:** 6327

It would be cool of a poor Vietnamese couple adopted it.

Damen · **Posted:** Thu Oct 06, 2005 5:05 pm

That's one lucky turkey baster

Cap'n Squirrgle · **Posted:** Thu Oct 06, 2005 5:17 pm

Damen Wrote:

That's one lucky turkey baster

This made my day.

paladisiac · **Posted:** Thu Oct 06, 2005 5:24 pm

DumpJack Wrote:

huskerpunk Wrote:

I hope their kid needs Ritalin.

That would be awesome. Some little jumpy hyperactive fucker.

i'm sure oprah could donate a spare couch

Dunwoody Dude · **Joined:** Wed Nov 03, 2004 11:20 am **Posts:** 2869

el_scorcho Wrote:

I hate it when people say that men are pregnant or when couples say "we" are pregnant. Pregnant means you got a baby growing inside you. Men can't do that.

You wouldn't happen to be the kind of sports fan that says things like this about your team-"Our pitching is strong but we've got to do something about our bats"

Steve

A Northern Soul · **Joined:** Mon Oct 25, 2004 12:23 pm **Posts:** 3742

source

Quit yellin', it's only childbirth

Katie Holmes' mission impossible will be giving birth without painkillers - or screaming.

That's because her fiancé, "Mission Impossible" star Tom Cruise, is a Scientologist.

Practitioners of Scientology are against drugs but insist on "silent birth" because they believe it's traumatic for babies to hear their mothers groan or cry.

"Maintain silence in the presence of birth to save the sanity of the mother and the child and safeguard the home to which they will go," church founder L. Ron Hubbard wrote in his best-selling "Dianetics."

That's easier to preach than practice.

Another famous Scientologist, actress Kelly Preston, told Redbook magazine in 2000 that she screamed for an epidural while giving birth at home to daughter Ella.

But her husband, actor John Travolta, who is also a Scientologist, didn't have time to drive Preston to the hospital.

"It got hard-core at the end because she was big," Preston said of her 13-hour ordeal.

Travolta later described it as a "beautiful, still experience that lovingly brings a child into the world without screaming or talking."

Of course, he didn't have the baby.

Scientologists also favor seven days of silence for newborns so their first week on Earth is trauma-free. But this has run afoul of state-mandated blood tests, which require at least a pinprick.

Dusty Chalk · **Posted:** Thu Oct 06, 2005 8:33 pm

neuroboy Wrote:

so, read the headline. the soon-to-be-messed-up-fucking-kid is due 6 mos. after they started dating? hmmmmm. . .

I think it means they got her pregnant after 6 mos. of dating, not that the baby is due 6 mos. after they started dating.

Yes, apparently, it's been 6 mos. of that shit. Or maybe they're trying to hurry things along so that Katie can get out of the contract sooner...

fuse · **Posted:** Thu Oct 06, 2005 9:24 pm

Anyone seen my mom on this thread? Mom? Aunt Karen?

Charli · **Posted:** Thu Oct 06, 2005 9:35 pm

Northern Soul Wrote:

source

Quit yellin', it's only childbirth

Katie Holmes' mission impossible will be giving birth without painkillers - or screaming.

That's because her fiancé, "Mission Impossible" star Tom Cruise, is a Scientologist.

Practitioners of Scientology are against drugs but insist on "silent birth" because they believe it's traumatic for babies to hear their mothers groan or cry.

"Maintain silence in the presence of birth to save the sanity of the mother and the child and safeguard the home to which they will go," church founder L. Ron Hubbard wrote in his best-selling "Dianetics."

That's easier to preach than practice.

Another famous Scientologist, actress Kelly Preston, told Redbook magazine in 2000 that she screamed for an epidural while giving birth at home to daughter Ella.

But her husband, actor John Travolta, who is also a Scientologist, didn't have time to drive Preston to the hospital.

"It got hard-core at the end because she was big," Preston said of her 13-hour ordeal.

Travolta later described it as a "beautiful, still experience that lovingly brings a child into the world without screaming or talking."

Of course, he didn't have the baby.

Scientologists also favor seven days of silence for newborns so their first week on Earth is trauma-free. But this has run afoul of state-mandated blood tests, which require at least a pinprick.

Oh screw them.

This just made me want to puke. I'd like to see them try to have a baby squeezed out of a small hole. As for the "seven days of silence for newborns" my god, they truly are losers.

I'm tempted to make some really vulgar comments right now but wanting to maintain some form of ladylike behavior, I will refrain. These people make super super angry.

But seriously, if her parents were smart they would get her away from him pronto and put a restraining order upon him.

Dusty Chalk · **Posted:** Thu Oct 06, 2005 10:27 pm

Charli Wrote:

sorry, didn't see the thread from earlier. My bad.

No worries, this ended up being the better thread anyway.

Cotton · **Joined:** Mon Oct 25, 2004 6:12 pm **Posts:** 17155

seafoam · **Posted:** Fri Oct 07, 2005 10:53 am

Northern Soul Wrote:

source

Quit yellin', it's only childbirth

Katie Holmes' mission impossible will be giving birth without painkillers - or screaming.

That's because her fiancé, "Mission Impossible" star Tom Cruise, is a Scientologist.

Practitioners of Scientology are against drugs but insist on "silent birth" because they believe it's traumatic for babies to hear their mothers groan or cry.

"Maintain silence in the presence of birth to save the sanity of the mother and the child and safeguard the home to which they will go," church founder L. Ron Hubbard wrote in his best-selling "Dianetics."

That's easier to preach than practice.

Another famous Scientologist, actress Kelly Preston, told Redbook magazine in 2000 that she screamed for an epidural while giving birth at home to daughter Ella.

But her husband, actor John Travolta, who is also a Scientologist, didn't have time to drive Preston to the hospital.

"It got hard-core at the end because she was big," Preston said of her 13-hour ordeal.

Travolta later described it as a "beautiful, still experience that lovingly brings a child into the world without screaming or talking."

Of course, he didn't have the baby.

Scientologists also favor seven days of silence for newborns so their first week on Earth is trauma-free. But this has run afoul of state-mandated blood tests, which require at least a pinprick.

Scientologists don't realize that it is pretty loud in that womb of hers. In recent studies it has actually been found that loud sounds calm infants, especially rhythmic or pulsating ones. The mothers heart beat, digestion, voice and even external noises are clearly heard in the womb. In one instance, for fussy infants it has been recommended to run a vacuum cleaner beside you holding the infant in close proximity to take in the "whooshing" sounds of noisy air. After reading about these certain examples I decided to make a cd mix of songs I like, but that would also have a constant beat and a myriad of sounds. Artists like Sigur Ros, Mogwai, Mum, Elton John, and others, I kid you not Ripley, would soothe, calm, and make sleep our infant son. And let me tell you, I would play it pretty loud and cradle him to and fro in front of the computer speakers.

Dunwoody Dude · **Joined:** Wed Nov 03, 2004 11:20 am **Posts:** 2869

I bet flashing cameras in a newborn's face must suck though.

Steve

katie, a princess · **Posted:** Sat Oct 08, 2005 9:23 pm

i was hoping this thread was about me.

just kidding i don't even know what that means

splates · **Posted:** Sat Oct 08, 2005 9:27 pm

seafoam Wrote:

Northern Soul Wrote:

source

Quit yellin', it's only childbirth

Katie Holmes' mission impossible will be giving birth without painkillers - or screaming.

That's because her fiancé, "Mission Impossible" star Tom Cruise, is a Scientologist.

Practitioners of Scientology are against drugs but insist on "silent birth" because they believe it's traumatic for babies to hear their mothers groan or cry.

"Maintain silence in the presence of birth to save the sanity of the mother and the child and safeguard the home to which they will go," church founder L. Ron Hubbard wrote in his best-selling "Dianetics."

That's easier to preach than practice.

Another famous Scientologist, actress Kelly Preston, told Redbook magazine in 2000 that she screamed for an epidural while giving birth at home to daughter Ella.

But her husband, actor John Travolta, who is also a Scientologist, didn't have time to drive Preston to the hospital.

"It got hard-core at the end because she was big," Preston said of her 13-hour ordeal.

Travolta later described it as a "beautiful, still experience that lovingly brings a child into the world without screaming or talking."

Of course, he didn't have the baby.

Scientologists also favor seven days of silence for newborns so their first week on Earth is trauma-free. But this has run afoul of state-mandated blood tests, which require at least a pinprick.

Scientologists don't realize that it is pretty loud in that womb of hers. In recent studies it has actually been found that loud sounds calm infants, especially rhythmic or pulsating ones. The mothers heart beat, digestion, voice and even external noises are clearly heard in the womb. In one instance, for fussy infants it has been recommended to run a vacuum cleaner beside you holding the infant in close proximity to take in the "whooshing" sounds of noisy air. After reading about these certain examples I decided to make a cd mix of songs I like, but that would also have a constant beat and a myriad of sounds. Artists like Sigur Ros, Mogwai, Mum, Elton John, and others, I kid you not Ripley, would soothe, calm, and make sleep our infant son. And let me tell you, I would play it pretty loud and cradle him to and fro in front of the computer speakers.

Yep, loud sounds etc do drive the baby into a deeper sleep.

katie, a princess · **Posted:** Sat Oct 08, 2005 9:27 pm

seafoam Wrote:

Scientologists don't realize that it is pretty loud in that womb of hers. In recent studies it has actually been found that loud sounds calm infants, especially rhythmic or pulsating ones. The mothers heart beat, digestion, voice and even external noises are clearly heard in the womb. In one instance, for fussy infants it has been recommended to run a vacuum cleaner beside you holding the infant in close proximity to take in the "whooshing" sounds of noisy air.

i don't think scientologists care about your "science"

MontyTheMongoose · **Posted:** Sun Oct 09, 2005 5:32 am

katie, a princess Wrote:

i was hoping this thread was about me.

just kidding i don't even know what that means

Over breakfast of strawberries and creme, and the Sunday Times of London - NY Times? Pshaw, to your crummy colonial rags - Aaron turned away from the financial page and queried, "Who is Tom?"

Oh No! Tom and Katie pregnant.

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