It's shit like this, much more so than Iraq, or the MexiWall or meth addicted molos that makes me weep for the future.

The new dumb meet the new Jesus freaks and saddle their children with the stupidest fucking names ever.


By JENNIFER 8. LEE
Published: May 18, 2006
Chances are you don't have any friends named Nevaeh. Chances are today's toddlers will.

In 1999, there were only eight newborn American girls named Nevaeh. Last year, it was the 70th-most-popular name for baby girls, ahead of Sara, Vanessa and Amanda.

The spectacular rise of Nevaeh (commonly pronounced nah-VAY-uh) has little precedent, name experts say. They watched it break into the top 1,000 of girls' names in 2001 at No. 266, the third-highest debut ever. Four years later it cracked the top 100 with 4,457 newborn Nevaehs, having made the fastest climb among all names in more than a century, the entire period for which the Social Security Administration has such records.

Nevaeh is not in the Bible or any religious text. It is not from a foreign language. It is not the name of a celebrity, real or fictional.

Nevaeh is Heaven spelled backward.

The name has hit a cultural nerve with its religious overtones, creative twist and fashionable final "ah" sound. It has risen most quickly among blacks but is also popular with evangelical Christians, who have helped propel other religious names like Grace (ranked 14th) up the charts, experts say. By contrast, the name Heaven is ranked 245th.

"Of the last couple of generations, Nevaeh is certainly the most remarkable phenomenon in baby names," said Cleveland Kent Evans, president of the American Name Society and a professor of psychology at Bellevue University in Nebraska.

The surge of Nevaeh can be traced to a single event: the appearance of a Christian rock star, Sonny Sandoval of P.O.D., on MTV in 2000 with his baby daughter, Nevaeh. "Heaven spelled backwards," he said.

Among the many inspired by Mr. Sandoval's appearance was Jade San Luis, who named his first daughter Nevaeh two years later. "It felt original," said Mr. San Luis, 26, of Cerritos, Calif. "Now, not anymore."

Today Mr. Sandoval is introduced to and photographed with baby Nevaehs all the time. His own Nevaeh, now 6, skateboards and, when introduced, pipes up that her name is Heaven spelled backward. Does she understand the meaning of heaven? Mr. Sandoval replied, "She knows that is where her grandmother is."

I said it before and I'll say it again, Warrant saw this coming.

Man, I've never heard that name before. It's really not that shocking, the rise in popularity. Because of Seinfeld, I've been pushing the names "Seven" and "Soda" for my unborn children.

I was never a Seinfeld watcher, but didn't "Married With Children" beat them to a kid named Seven?

Let's not forget Six from Blossom.

I tried to convince my sister that, if she had a girl, to name her Wamsutta Percale.

There was a kid named 5 in the Peanuts comic strip back in the '60s.

I haven't seen many episodes of Married with Children, I was banned from watching that from my parents as a kid. But the "Seven" was because Mickey Mantle was George's favorite player, and his number. Don't know how it went with Married with Children, but I'm curious.

Well, my kids were named after Highlander Macleod and a Russian exchange student who lived with my wife's family when she was a teenager, but at least Connor and Marina are good names.

Nevaeh might be sweet if it had some actual ethnic history, but P.O.D. is not exactly an original tribe of Judah or an ancient Sumerian goddess.

My favorite show EVER!

While Adrian Paul and the TV show were vastly superior to all but the first of the Highlander movies, no way was I gonna name my son Adrian. He's got enough trouble being the kinda kid he is already.

What about the name Regnom for a boy?

I like Huf better. The whole "it could be a real name, plus it only has one 'f' does the trick for me.

I spend a lot of time around evangelical christians and live in a town that is 60% black. I have never, in my life, heard the name neveah. This article is about two sarcastic remarks away from being an onion article. Who is Jennifer 8. Lee, and why is her middle name 8? haha.

It is ridiculous though. Although I know a handful of chiquitas and my dad has two twin patients named Lemonjello and Orangejello( they are pronounced: LAY-Mon-ZHE-LOW and OR-ONj-Zhe-Low)

I however, am going to name my first born son with some roots in the old greek. He will be Testicles (Tes-Tih-Kleez). My father said in response to that, "thank god you're not close to having children yet".

That Jello lie has been around since I was 10 y/o.

And the Jennifer 8. Lee is pretty funny. I know she did some political reporting during the last presidential, and I think the 8 is as preposterous as naming your kid anything backwards.

Although I keep threatening that any kid I have, boy or girl, will be named "Mallory," which is funny for those who know my last name

Yeah. Except the lie was thought to be true by one mother in my town. I have seen their files. Shhhh. Don't tell HIPPA.

Good fucking christ. That's the second time in as many weeks that someone has dug up the old Orangejello garbage.