I was informed that an old, old friend of mine died today. She was only twenty. Car crash.

Myself, her, and my cousin spent many summers together hanging out at my aunt and uncle's house up in cottage country when we were little. I ended up going on to date her sister during highschool, despite the fact that we had moved out to the suburbs by then.

I didn't think it would affect me that much since I hadn't seen her in years and we ended up becoming quite different people when we grew up. But it still turned out to be pretty painful.

The funeral's Monday. I've only been to one funeral in my life -- my great-grandfather -- so I don't know how well I'll cope. My parents will be there since our four parents have been close since before me, my sisters, and their daughters were born. Still.


This was not something I needed.

I'm sorry for your loss. I don't know what else say.

Sorry to hear about that.


Unexpected deaths, even to those who aren't especially close to us can be especially powerful as it reminds us of our own mortality.

i'm sorry to hear about your loss, losing someone close to you is never easy.

last year i dealt with losing someone close to me, it was unexpected and i couldn't help blame myself (a friend committed suicide). to this day, i'm still not over it, nor do i think i will ever be and every day something reminds me of him. and i've lost quite a few other friends as well.

although it causes us a lot of pain in our lives, the most one can do in a situation like this is to remember the things we do have and be grateful for our existence. (i know it sounds cheesy, but sometimes it's a wake up call to appreciate those around us).

if you need to talk, please don't hesitate to im/pm/e-mail me.

Within the past month, actually.

I'm sorry to hear your news. Do your best, and take care of yourself. Sometimes, that's all you can do.

very sorry to hear that.

take care of yourself man.

So sorry for you.

So sorry, Harley.

Like Dri said, PM or email me if you'd like to.

Yeah, Dri's got it. I lost someone extremely influential to my life to suicide when I was 14, and I still regularly think about her. It's a tough thing to deal with, but those in it with you can be great support. Sadly, an ex-girlfriend of mine was abducted and murdered last summer. I've been mostly separated from all our shared friends and have had absolutely no closure. It seems like a taboo, avoided issue.

I'm sorry to hear about your loss. You know where to find us for support.

I'm very sorry to hear about your friend, Harley. Remember the good times and by all means, talk about her. Cry if you need to -- trust me, it helps with the healing process.

The co-owner/manager at my first place of employment -- during eleventh grade, '96-7, Gilles' Frozen Custard Drive-in -- died in 2001. He was 42. I happened to scan the death notices on the day his ran, and, bam! Figured it must have been an heart attack in his sleep.

Now, it surprised me, and I felt sorry for his young children, who would have been just entering their teens, but he had been a real taskmaster at work, so I just knew the stress finally got to him, and I didn't feel bad-bad for him.

Then, four years later, I found out from a co-worker at my nights-job at AMC that the man had killed himself; gun to the head. At that, I really didn't feel bad for him. But, yeah, the stress must have really gotten to him.

Yeah I've lost lots of people.

Sorry about yours, too.

I spent every summer on the Outer Banks of North Carolina. Almost every year someone died taht I knew or worked with. Car crash, Plane crash, drowning. It's never easy. I was never too close to them, but knew most of them well. It makes you stop and it always feels really heavy.

Other than that it has always been family and they have either been in the process for years like with cancer or something or they were really old so none of them were very shocking. Sad, yes, but they didn't shock your whole world like these others can and do.

I am sorry to hear about this. I hope that you are coping well and that you have surrounded yourself with good friends to help you cope.

A guy I work with had 9 funerals in the past 5 weeks. He had to start choosing whose funerals he was going to attend. I felt really bad for him. They were all weird too. Car crashes. His brother's mother in law was murdered by a stalker, etc. I wouldn't know what to do in a situation like that.

Again, I am sorry to hear that you and her family have to go through all this. Death is pretty sucky.

sorry to hear about your loss.

I've lost some, which I'm not gonna go into here. it's never aneasy thing to get over, though, and I can only remind you to remember her life more than her death.

The funeral was today and it wasn't that bad. I got through it fine. The burial and the wake too.


But I just finished talking to the deceased's sister, my ex-girlfriend. We hadn't really spoken in the past few years since we broke up. I apologized about everything and informed her that I wasn't lying when I had said back then that I thought we should break up because of the distance issues. She said she believes me and went to bed.


I listened to Wilco's 'I Am Trying To Break Your Heart' earlier and it keeps playing over and over in my head and this is hitting me harder than anything else today.


A death of someone you know is hard. But the death of a relationship, when you realise too late that you made a mistake, and you know that it was all your fault. That stings.

Sorry to hear about that. I knew this girl back when I was growing up. Used to cut her parents lawn. Used to flirt back and forth. I learned one day that she had died in a car accident. It seems like some alternate reality. When someone is sick you can kind of prepare yourself. You can imagine a world without them. When its sudden its just an odd feeling. You beging to reevaluate a bunch of things. You were closer than I was with this girl I was speaking about, so I'm sure you are even more feeling this sense of alternate reality. Keep in there. Remember the good times (sounds cliched), and just keep her memory alive.