Breaking up...

MiceElf · **Posted:** Wed Dec 06, 2006 4:01 pm

loserdork Wrote:

Also, can I get any music recommendations that might help me see this through?
Been listening to alot of Elliott Smith, Cat Power, Beach Boys, Beatles, and Cold War Kids.

A Boy Named Thor – Untitled
http://a.parsons.edu/~corace/thor/mp3/Untitled.mp3

Elliott Smith – Trouble (cover, unmastered)
http://www.cutthechord.com/ElliottSmith ... stered.mp3

Young and Sexy – Oh My Love
http://www.youngandsexy.org/music/ohmylove.mp3

Andrew Morgan – Misadventures in Radiology
http://www.andrew-morgan.com/flash/mp3/05.mp3

Jim Guthrie – So Small
http://www.threegutrecords.com/mp3/Jim_ ... _Small.mp3

Azure Ray – If You Fall
http://www.saddle-creek.com/sounds/Azur ... ouFall.mp3

Kingsbury Manx - Grape to Grain
http://www.thekingsburymanx.com/m_downl ... ograin.mp3

greezy · **Posted:** Wed Dec 06, 2006 4:11 pm

Chappy Wrote:

greezy Wrote:

stay fucked up on your drug of choice, there will be others.

Ah yes, replace the dependence on the girl with a dependence on a narcotic, always a great decision especially for people with already realized unstable mental health. Best advice of 2006. Nothing says "cope" more than a little self-medication with an illegal drug.

it doesn't have to be illegal, for many people the drug of choice is booze. and yeah, sometimes a little self-medication can be really really helpful.

Hegel · **Posted:** Wed Dec 06, 2006 4:16 pm

greezy Wrote:

Chappy Wrote:

greezy Wrote:

stay fucked up on your drug of choice, there will be others.

Ah yes, replace the dependence on the girl with a dependence on a narcotic, always a great decision especially for people with already realized unstable mental health. Best advice of 2006. Nothing says "cope" more than a little self-medication with an illegal drug.

it doesn't have to be illegal, for many people the drug of choice is booze. and yeah, sometimes a little self-medication can be really really helpful.

Maybe for some average guy, but for a guy that is probably already on some sort of psychotropic medication (don't know that, just assuming), I can't imagine using any sort of depressant or stimulant in excess to forget his problems will be helpful at all. And, IMO, it would probably make things WAY worse.

But, I am a little sensitive to the issue because of what I saw in one of my previous jobs...

Timis · **Posted:** Wed Dec 06, 2006 4:18 pm

sorry to hear about your breakup...

the cure got me through a rough one.....
and around that time for some reason barenaked ladies - rock spectacle got me happy again

greezy · **Posted:** Wed Dec 06, 2006 4:25 pm

Chappy Wrote:

greezy Wrote:

Chappy Wrote:

greezy Wrote:

stay fucked up on your drug of choice, there will be others.

Ah yes, replace the dependence on the girl with a dependence on a narcotic, always a great decision especially for people with already realized unstable mental health. Best advice of 2006. Nothing says "cope" more than a little self-medication with an illegal drug.

it doesn't have to be illegal, for many people the drug of choice is booze. and yeah, sometimes a little self-medication can be really really helpful.

Maybe for some average guy, but for a guy that is probably already on some sort of psychotropic medication (don't know that, just assuming), I can't imagine using any sort of depressant or stimulant in excess to forget his problems will be helpful at all. And, IMO, it would probably make things WAY worse.

But, I am a little sensitive to the issue because of what I saw in one of my previous jobs...

as a long term solution, i totally agree. as a short term way to pass some of the very suckiest of time, i don't know of anything more effective. he can take my advice for what its worth. i've been in pretty much the exact same spot (dependant on girl, history of depression), and i'm glad i had some friends that dragged me out and pumped me full of drugs and liquor.

jewels santana · **Joined:** Thu Nov 04, 2004 2:36 pm **Posts:** 10198

Cap'n Squirrgle Wrote:

Consider also, that if you wind up seeing her around at places where you had any notion at all that she might be, it's because you wanted to run into her. Not because of luck, or chance, or any other stupid excuse. Because you wanted to. You're capable of avoiding her and getting better, I suspect. You just have to want to.

girl dumped me two years ago, i ran into her constantly.
same girl dumped me this year and i've seen her four times in the last 7 months.

she still lives four blocks away, but i'm not as big of an idiot this time.

Cap'n Squirrgle · **Posted:** Wed Dec 06, 2006 4:31 pm

Bingo, Jewels.

Modem · **Posted:** Wed Dec 06, 2006 4:43 pm

don't let your friends take you to a strip club. I don't know why this seems to be the instinctual impulse for some people... but it just makes things worse. Did for me, anyway. Waste of money and time.

fancypants · **Posted:** Wed Dec 06, 2006 4:47 pm

If he is on some sort of medication, most likely it is a really bad idea to drink. Those medications require a lot of power from your liver, and drinking will make your liver work overtime. Then the liver cells go on strike, which gets the kidneys thinking about their own wages, the organs unionize, and pretty soon you're bedridden while your body stalls in negotiations.

Hegel · **Posted:** Wed Dec 06, 2006 5:15 pm

greezy Wrote:

Chappy Wrote:

greezy Wrote:

Chappy Wrote:

greezy Wrote:

stay fucked up on your drug of choice, there will be others.

Ah yes, replace the dependence on the girl with a dependence on a narcotic, always a great decision especially for people with already realized unstable mental health. Best advice of 2006. Nothing says "cope" more than a little self-medication with an illegal drug.

it doesn't have to be illegal, for many people the drug of choice is booze. and yeah, sometimes a little self-medication can be really really helpful.

Maybe for some average guy, but for a guy that is probably already on some sort of psychotropic medication (don't know that, just assuming), I can't imagine using any sort of depressant or stimulant in excess to forget his problems will be helpful at all. And, IMO, it would probably make things WAY worse.

But, I am a little sensitive to the issue because of what I saw in one of my previous jobs...

as a long term solution, i totally agree. as a short term way to pass some of the very suckiest of time, i don't know of anything more effective. he can take my advice for what its worth. i've been in pretty much the exact same spot (dependant on girl, history of depression), and i'm glad i had some friends that dragged me out and pumped me full of drugs and liquor.

I understand what you're saying now. Even still, I am not a proponent of people in bad places drinking or using some sort of drug mostly because the people I have known in that situation either get arrested for some felony or they end up killing someone accidentally, possibly even themselves. But I get what you mean. Sort of that guy bonding bs that seems to make things better and forget about things for just a little while...

fancypants · **Posted:** Wed Dec 06, 2006 5:21 pm

Honestly, I really don't like drinking when I'm feeling down. It makes me feel significantly worse. When I am down, I usually just don't feel like drinking anyway.

discostu · **Posted:** Wed Dec 06, 2006 5:49 pm

I've been going through a rough one myself. The girl dumped me and it sucks. The only thing that has helped me has been the old adage "out of sight out of mind". We were living together during the 1st month of the breakup and I was literally driving myself bonkers wondering who she was seeing, where she was, etc. I was a pathetic pile of misery.
If you ever hope to have even a friendship with this girl, stay out of each other's lives. No matter how difficult you think it may sound, it's not nearly as difficult as getting the image of your gal with another guy out of your mind.

Oh, and go to a therapist for your other issues. Seriously, like others have said, you'll never be able to be in a decent relationship until you figure out your own shit.

And, as far as music goes, I have to listen to loud music about drugs and satan or some electronic stuff. Anything as long as the lyrics aren't about love, etc. DON'T LISTEN TO ELLIOT SMITH for crissakes.

MiceElf · **Posted:** Wed Dec 06, 2006 7:06 pm

Who wants to listen to happy music when you are sad? It just makes you feel more alone (and envious of happy people).

Rick Derris · **Posted:** Wed Dec 06, 2006 7:08 pm

MiceElf Wrote:

Who wants to listen to happy music when you are sad? It just makes you feel more alone (and envious of happy people).

I agree.

Misery loves company.

timmyjoe42 · **Posted:** Wed Dec 06, 2006 7:14 pm

Rick Derris Wrote:

MiceElf Wrote:

Who wants to listen to happy music when you are sad? It just makes you feel more alone (and envious of happy people).

I agree.

Misery loves company.

I disagree. Happy music makes me happy. It makes me tap my toes and sing out loud. It makes being alone more enjoyable. It makes me feel more alive.

Listening to sad music when I am sad only makes me feel closer to death.

loserdork · **Posted:** Wed Dec 06, 2006 7:53 pm

Thank you for all the responses.

I will be doing my best to not encounter her.

My birthday is coming up next week. It's going to be a tough one. Right now at least, I'm not in the mood for celebration. My friends are insisting that we have a party. I just know that the whole time, I'll be wishing that she'd be there.

Cap'n Squirrgle · **Posted:** Wed Dec 06, 2006 8:03 pm

loserdork Wrote:

My birthday is coming up next week. It's going to be a tough one. Right now at least, I'm not in the mood for celebration. My friends are insisting that we have a party. I just know that the whole time, I'll be wishing that she'd be there.

Buy yourself some tail.

timmyjoe42 · **Posted:** Wed Dec 06, 2006 8:12 pm

Girls love to give it up to birthday boys just out of a relationship. Having a one night stand is a great first step to moving on.

Cap'n Squirrgle · **Posted:** Wed Dec 06, 2006 8:16 pm

What he needs is a sad story (check), lots of beer, and the right bar. That and probably 15 minutes of concentrated How To from Colin in Texas.

Leon · **Posted:** Wed Dec 06, 2006 9:07 pm

whatever you do don't sit around by yourself thinking about her, cuz I did that for a long time after my first serious girl friend and it was pretty much hell. The best thing that I've found to do is to stay busy so you don't have as much time to think about her and what happened, oh and if she was cheating on you than I wouldn't try to remain friends with her because try as you like I'm willing to bet that thats something you won't ever be able to forget about.

As for music Blurs-13 is a great break up cd, I think it was written right after Damon Albarn broke up with the girl from Elastica

ayah · **Joined:** Mon Oct 25, 2004 12:03 pm **Posts:** 6402

man, you guys are fucked up.

rogneeb · **Joined:** Mon Oct 25, 2004 1:07 pm **Posts:** 12618

i think you were probably just too cocky for her

loserdork · **Posted:** Thu Dec 07, 2006 8:54 am

FUCK...

I can go through most of the day fine. I'm not happy sunshine boy, but I can still laugh and joke around. It's at night, when I go to sleep when things get really hard. We got used to sleeping together. She had trouble sleeping and I would help her get to sleep. Now I'm having trouble sleeping. I lay awake at night thinking to them having sex and it makes me feel like I'm dying.

I think I need some Ambien or something.

Dalen · **Posted:** Thu Dec 07, 2006 9:59 am

best advice: get your dick sucked.

MiceElf · **Posted:** Thu Dec 07, 2006 11:07 am

loserdork Wrote:

I think I need some Ambien or something.

My PSA [read: dorky statement] for the day -- don't medicate. Seriously, use music and other things to distract your mind. Biking, walking, jogging...whatever...get your endorphins going and you'll feel healthier mentally and phsyically and sleep better.

Breaking up...

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