I think I got my ass warmed up maybe twice as a kid. It was the threat of it happening again that got me to shut up and act right.

ahh. the amatuer hour.

a big part of the problem stems from the way she probably parented him from the beginning.

from the time they were babies we set up the house in such a way that we weren't always having to say no about stuff. honestly i'm lazy and didn't find much fun in being a bitch all day.

we had one tv in the living room and one computer in a den area. a public area. i'm not saying this doesn't mean your kid won't get into porn because at some point they probably will.
no personal laptops until they were in high school. no cell phones until they were in high school and the oldest pays part of her bill.

from the time they were small they always had limited screen time. screen meaning x box, video games, computer crap and television. my kids actually learned to turn the tv off if there was nothing they wanted to watch.

oh and all this stuff was shortened or taken away as punishment but not really all that often. the worst punishment i could inflict on my kids was not reading to them before bedtime--up until they were 10 or 11.

you're the parent. you can make these decisions and if your kid gets pissed off they will get over it. you can set the rules early and they just become part of their lives. i hit each of my kids once and felt like shit afterward and so did they. hitting leads to nothing but fear and disrespect and really, it's just bullying. and btw, bullying is just as twisted as trying to be your kid's friend.

so far so good but i've got a way to go with my kids--they're 18 and 15--and anything can happen at any minute. i'm not saying i haven't made mistakes because quite honestly i'm still sick about putting them through a sepaeration when they were entering high school and junior high respectively. all you can do is try to pay attention as closely as you can.

i got my ass beat more than a few times to the point of drawing blood. it didn't stop me from doing one fucking thing. in fact i preferred a crack across the face to being grounded or having stuff taken away because the pain was over quicker.

my thoughts were always, big deal, you're bigger and stronger than me.
so yeah, whatever.

Your kids are high, Laura.

I think there is a big difference in hitting a kid, and spanking a kid.

Kids also know that they have the child abuse card to use against parents, so parents probably can't even spank them anymore anyway.

I dunno, punishing a kid with Xbox, computer, phone, or tv in their room teaches them nothing. Many parents are so passive in their parenting. Like the other morning in church, a kid was running around the church and making noises, the parent just ignored the kid like it was a phone ringing in the middle of a movie. He should have taken the kid to the hallway, and regulated, and be the adult.

yeah 2,3 and 5 year olds are savvy that way.
kids whose parents put cigarettes out on their arms don't call lawyers because abuse equals attentuion and bad attention is better than no attention.



it teaches them that there are consequences that don't involve not getting hit.
and those parents should have picked up that kid and left. it's called bad parenting and a kid shouldn't be hit for that.

all hitting does is give the parent the illusion that they are in control of their children. i'm going to say it again, there is absolutely no reason to hit a child of any age. it's about you losing control not gaining control.

Laura's pretty awesome in this thread.

ayah sounds smart and has more experience.

I'm not talking about BEATING a kid just because you're a drunk or whatever stereotype everyone is picturing in their heads.

My point, really, is that shithead kids need to respect their parents and if corporal punishment is the only thing that works, then the parent needs to do it.

Kids more often become shithead kids because they've had shithead behavior modeled for them.That's not to say some kids aren't born shitheads because they are but there are far more environmentally formed shitheads than genetic ones.

I can agree with this.

I can see this discussion escalating and me saying some things, so I'm going to step away. Ayah, I respect what yr saying, but I think if we sat down and talked in person I could articulate better and you would understand what I'm saying. Hitting kids is horrible. I think we all can agree to that. Heck, hitting anyone is horrible but I think you completely misunderstood what I was saying.

i am not afraid of you.

there isn't a need to be. I just think I'm not in the mood to persue anything here.

What a crock of shit. With all the online sex offender registries out there it shouldn't have taken more than a day or two to get this little bastard's dry asshole fingered while Hooverin' a 73 year old man's pruny, mothball smellin' nutsack.

I 100% agree with Laura, as usual.

Yes. This is truly Bort's finest hour

Yeah, I'm not having kids.

Dogs are hard enough.

one day-old thread pwned by ayah

You'll get my belt when you pry it from my cold, dead hand.

Laura's read quite a few of the same parenting books that I have I guess.

i never read one book about parenting.
some of it's insticnct and a lot of it was having an awesome partner.
again, i also learned from making a lot of mistakes.