i'd like to illustrate this thread with a relevant poem I wrote some years ago. I think Spoon will appreciate this most, being from New England.


The Last Time I Shit at Marden's

The last time I shit at marden's
it was a grey night beating down the doors
working it like a NASCAR driver
almost spread out on all fours

It was one of those shits
where you're sure the staff are spying
laughing at your mess from behind the walls
as you work to get your boxers drying

when i stepped out of the restroom
in all it's wood-panelled glory
i expected a demeaning fanfare;
the night manager demanding a story

But I fix him with a stare instead
One that says "The walls of your shitter are red"
He knows he can delegate the cleaning up
And still get in his "alone time" in the shed.

*Laughed it up t'beat the all-holy jesus shitstorm, bubbie*

Was on the phone with a Marden's rep this morning about a construction story, actually.