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Prince of Darkness
 Post subject: I think it's time to ban keyboards from urban music.
PostPosted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 9:10 pm 
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frostingspoon
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I've got this friend who made a mix of "urban" artists, and god does it suck.

Especially prevalent is alot of horrible keyboard shit. I mean, really bad fake piano sounds, fake nylon guitar sounds, unhip keyboard percussion sounds.

And what the fuck is up with all the oohs and ahhs? The only redeeming quality about THAT shit is that the oohs and ahhs are lyrically more universal, and have deeper meaning than the shitty lyrics.

Can't John Legend afford a fucking studio with one fucking real piano? They're billing this bitch as a pianist, not a piece of shit keyboardist. Shit sounds sequenced, all the phrasing sounds quantized.

Fuck all these bitch ass artists.

Seriously, what if we banned keyboards, oohs, and ahhs from urban music for a year? What would happen? There'd be a lot less music from those artists, but I bet the quality would spike, cause it'd be a fucking miracle if it got worse.

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Senator LooGAR
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PostPosted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 9:12 pm 
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Are we talking Modern R&B ala Mary J. Blige and shit like that?

Openly the worst kind of music on the planet.

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Prince of Darkness
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PostPosted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 9:12 pm 
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Let's not even get started with the fake ass string sounds.

This genre pulls in more money than the roman catholic church and the nation of islam combined...

hire a fucking orchestra and george martin.

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Prince of Darkness
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PostPosted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 9:14 pm 
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Sen.LooGAR'sCrunkmas Wrote:
Are we talking Modern R&B ala Mary J. Blige and shit like that?

Openly the worst kind of music on the planet.


Let's just limit keyboard use to caucasians and asians for the one year ban.

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billy g
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PostPosted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 9:24 pm 
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do you really want to tell Stevie that he can't play the keys anymore?
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splates
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PostPosted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 9:30 pm 
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dr winston o'boogie Wrote:
do you really want to tell Stevie that he can't play the keys anymore?


Just send him a note with it on
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Prince of Darkness
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PostPosted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 9:37 pm 
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frostingspoon
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dr winston o'boogie Wrote:
do you really want to tell Stevie that he can't play the keys anymore?


He can play harmonica, drums, guitar, bass, and sing. He'll understand.

Besides, he falls under the caucasian/asian clause.

What, you're gonna tell me that the guy who wrote I just called to say I love you is black?

<---- huge stevie wonder fan.

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Dusty Chalk
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2005 4:04 am 
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Dorkestra Teacher Wrote:
What, you're gonna tell me that the guy who wrote I just called to say I love you is black?
I lol'd.

As a keyboardist, I can't help but agree. One of my fantasy gigs is to play keyboards in a band that plays everything else live on stage -- like Curve, or Garbage, or one of them. It's really sad that I can say -- with total humility -- that I am better than 99% of the crap you hear on the radio.

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Prince of Darkness
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2005 4:07 am 
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awesome. i love being quoted in sigs. it doesn't happen often, and i appreciate it.

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Sketch
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2005 5:26 am 
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I'm adding Dr. Dre to the list of offenders because I can.
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