Michelob ULTRA!

So it's after rehearsal, the night is young, only 1 in the morning. Fast forward to 3:30, i'm drunk on the above mentioned shit, sucking on a coke with no ice from white castle (20 sliders, 2 fries, split two ways, no pickles, jalapeno cheese). My best friend growing up is an ER intern, so any time we can hang is fairly precious. That's how this shit happened.

Called in sick, and heading to a job fair tomorrow where no one will give my resume a second look because I'll forget to shave in the morning, and I will probably smell like booze and smoke in spite of scrubbing myself under the shower. And i might forget to print up resumes.

I'm such a dumbfuck. Don't argue with me, but don't agree with me either. My spelling is remarkably accurate.

There's no way i can climb into bed smelling like this without waking her and the dog up. And i've got the worst case of hiccups in the history of the universe.

And i slammed my thumb in the door trying to close it quietly.

If it hurts this bad now, but i'm drunk enough that i forgot about it during the last two posts, then I'm probably in for some shit tomorrow huh?

You're still going to open mic tomorrow, right?

STOLIE

beer hiccups are lame

some of those are single malt scotch hiccups

That makes it OK then.


Oh, you damn right.

what a mess. pull yourself together prince of darkness, the world needs you.

You just gotta start earlier. I cracked a beer at my desk at around 4:30...drank 2, boarded, then hit this awesome Irish Bar/Burger place to suck back Red Hooks and eat the best burger in Alabama (and maybe the entire south, for realz)

But I was out by midnite...came home, drank a few more beers and talked on the phone. Up and surprisingly spry for this hour...need some coffee though.

Oh, and its not booze they smell on ya, P, it's FEAR. Get it in your mind that you are BETTER THAN THESE FUCKING PEOPLE, and you'll have a new job in no time.

i hope this doesn't mean we're not on for BEEF anymore this evening

you type well for being so drunk.

i was just thinking about how i drink too much. i had to take the day off too. but i scheduled it in advance so i dont feel guilty.

<== still waiting for more gym teacher exploits.

POD had to get going . . . as far as I know, he's planning on it. I have to close the store but I'll probably crash guys night if I'm not exhausted.

He probably shouldn't go to STOLIE unsupervised, he has a tendancy to dig himself a hole there.

the question is more like:
why do you do this to yourself?

i know, i'm a buzzkill.

This needs to be a line in a movie.

why are we not hanging out right now, phil?

Tell me you brought him the care package goods.

god i got so fucking drunk last night.
drinking away the pain doesn't work.

Dude, you need a slumpbuster, STAT!

Call up my buddy Rory and go out hoggin' for chrissakes.

yes sir!

You're... telling the truth, right?