alright....so as many of you are aware i'm getting ready to leave my job managing a cafe. As it so happens, there are a guy and a girl from the office building next door, both friends of mine to a degree, that ahave left their jobs as of this afternoon. They've been planning tonight for weeks now, and it involves crisscrossing the city tonight in a veritable orgasm of drunken behavior, drunk driving and poor planning. As one who's learned the lesson oh too well of drunken driving I told them I'd meet them at the bar up the street for a few drinks before they started this whole thing.
Please keep in mind that I know these people, but no more than you know the friendlier people you work with. A what's up in the morning and an "i'm gonna party my ass off tonight" in the evening. But we're friendly and I wanted to be there for their sending off. Well it turns out, the woman of this group was pretty hammered by the time i got there and proceeded to open up to me in the most insane torrent of confession I have ever yet to witness. She unloaded it all on me, how she was a stripper up until last year, bisexual, nymphomaniac, pain fetishist, she's sore from having sex with her tattoo artist last night, etc... pretty personal stuff from a girl who i know as relatively conservative "michelle from the office". She was doing body shots off of random guys in the bar (which is in essence a family restaurant)
When I look to Kevin (the guy she works with), it turns out h set up this entire night solely to watch her get wasted and dry-hump everything in sight. Kevin is dead sober and has volunteered to drive her around all night just so that later he can take her to the strip club and watch her dry-rape her stripper friends. He also gave her $100 in ones for ammunition. So yeah, he's psyched. I have three drinks and then leave as they're about to head to the next bar on their itenerary. On the way out we pass by the ice cream place next door (a cold stone creamery) where they have to break out into song when you tip them. Kevin dares Michelle to make them sing. So she goes in there, slams a fiver into the tip jar and demands that the poor girls behind the counter sing all five of the tip songs they know. They do this, with these louts cheering them on, and when they're done she not only flashes the staff but plants a big fat wet kiss on the register girl. At this point i'm embarrassed so i take off to my work so's I can pound espresso for the ride home and make sure nothing's burned down yet.
When I get inside there's like 15 people there all wasted and trying to get people to come back to a party their having later. Please bear in mind that it's only 8:00 or so and, after a 64 hour week i'm just ready to go home and pass out. But no. The two girls throwing the party, who I sort of know, are trying to get my girlfriend and I to go to their party, which is more or less a swinger thingy (I'm sure there's a word for this somewhere). The girlfriend and I are going into town tonight to check out some band that she's friends with from Pittsburgh. So I tell them thanks but I'm not really in that but to have fun and all that.
So I just got home, a bit wobbley, a note on the fridge says she and some friends have already gone down there and since I'm pretty beat up from the past week she assumed (correctly) that I'm not really in the mood for dealing with some bullshit band at the Khyber she figured I wouldn't really want to go.
so now i'm home alone with a fridge full of booze and most of my friends out or on the other side of the country. I plan on getting good and wasted, however, so I'm gonna sit here and type the shit out of this bitch since I'm freaking out and unable to smoke pot to calm myself down.

note: I swear to god i was making this all up. i was hoping to be in bed by 7:30 tonight. So I'm gonna do something I haven't done in awhile and just listen to a bunch of the new stuff on my iTunes and discuss what I hear as I descend into a stupor. I can assure you I'm well aware how pathetic drinking alone and posting on this board about songs everybody else has already heard is, but i'm too tired to get anby work done so cut me a fucking break. I'm gonna take a shower and crack a beer and be back in a few minutes.

holy shit that post is long. i apologize.

Yeah, but it was an awesome post.

Drinking alone only sucks if you let it suck.

If drinking alone is pathetic, then damn I'm pathetic, I've been drinking alone for the past month. That being said, that's a helluva time. You'd best be taking in some alone time. Cheers to you.

Doesn't necessarily have to be completely alone

[img][650:488]http://www.monkey.org/~jon/lucy/Lucy%20Lush.jpg[/img]

As you said, it only sucks when you let it, or wish too hard for company. I'm good company, I've always wished for two or three of me.

i'm realizing now that this started out like a bad penthouse forum letter and that wasn't my intention. I'm sure this shit happens to you single kids (and possibly, i dunno, californians?) all the time, but I'm pretty fucking tamed by now. I live in the suburbs fer crissakes. The most rockstar i get is putting eardrops in. This is the sort of thing that i can't really process and feel the need to blab about to y'all. So I had three beers in the shower and now i'm ready to begin. watch the typos grow...

why are you getting my cat drunk?????

1)Kiss Me Deadly - Randy
the first bunch of thee ten from blogs in the last coupla weeks. This song, i think, was a Lita Ford tune or some other shitty punktress-turned-crappy actress. This band is Norwiegan or some shit and I only downloaded it because whoever was laughing at how they pronounced the word job "yob" and it's true. Fucking hilarious. I remember my older siblings loving the original version of this to a wild degree, though the Generation X versio was always preferred. This is funny, but in that sort of novelty way that gets old halfway through the first listen. nice metal solo, though.

Do not rag on Kiss Me Deadly, man. It's classic, one of my favourites, no irony.

2)Lovin' You - Cagnee & Lavey (AKA Dean Wareham & Britta Phillips)
It's kinda sad but this song always reminds me of Vegas Vacation where Mrs. Griswold hits that really high note for Wayne Newton. I think it was that movie, but I could be wrong. It's pretty obvious by now the last thing I put into the iTunes was from that all covers blog. This version is nice, a bit toned down. I kinda wish Dean Wareham would sing as well, but what can ya do. I still think of Highball whenever I hear is voice so it's probably for the better.

3)Paranoid (Sabbath cover) - Inspiral Carpets
oh god this pisses all over everything great about the original. These guys were on a lot of drugs, right? I always mix them up with Love Spirals Downwards. Either way I never want to hear this again.

my mate hotboxed his car with his cat in and afterwards the cat run around pawing at the air.

4)He Treats Me Like a Dog - St. Louis Bessie
this is more like it. Simple '30s piano and vocal track, complete with record hiss. This makes me want to eat the bar harder than he eats me. smokey, classy. I don't know why this sort of thing isn't played more often in bars nowadays, but it's a shame it isn't. Desolation, frightening sincerity...I need a cigarette now to fill the mood.

Our very own Busty Rhodes has been known to cover this.
Drinking alone can be awesome. when I was in exile in NH I used to drink Scotch while balancing the glass on my knee and talking on the phone, when I couldn't keep the glass on my knee, it was time for bed.

I'm on Guinness pint #3, and watchin Godfather III, at least until Bill Maher comes on.

Hit It From the Back - Mobb Deep
I know next to nothing about Mobb Deep other than than "Shook Ones" but they're really young on this shit and I think Premier is responsible for this beat. Why are 14-year-olds rapping about this shit? goddamn you drug testing. I wonder if they're embarrassed by this song now.

You will be my new god.

do they still keep the mascot (imaginatively named "UGA") in Savannah and send it out via limo for games? That shit cracks me up.

Creep - The Afghan Whigs
despite not really liking TLC or the Afghan Whigs, this is pretty decent. Either I'm getting drunk or it's time to really hit the bottle. either way, stay tuned.

Itch U Can't Skratch - Junior Senior
um....if I hd gone out tonight and heard this I probably would be dancing my ass off. But since I rarely do much of either I'll say I don't have much place for it. Wherever I got this from claimed this was the greatest bigfoor reference ever, but I stand by Tenacious D's "Sasquatch". They are the same thing, right?

8)Joshua Gone Barbados - Jon Langford & Sally Timms
jesus do I only listen to cover songs? Eric Von Schmidt wrote this song, and I first heard about it when the Walkemn covered it their last time around. accoustic with a nice little slide guitar. It's a great little tune, and I have to say I like this version better than any I've heard, perhaps because Langford's voice just lends that ear of liberalism, giving even Billy Bragg a run for his money. good stuff.

Well,his owners/breeders are from Savannah, so yeah. He also has an Air-conditioned doghouse on the sidelines...and it's pronounced "Uh-Guh" so, yeah its pretty imaginative, Jocko...g'head, name me a better mascot.

hey I ain't knockin it. Shit the Sixers have a rabbit names "hip-hop" that rides a segway. I just remember reading that in Midnightin the Garden of Good and Evil two days after I moved down there and getting a solid chuckle out of it.

9)Gold Fronts - A Gun Called Tension
I got this from Chase a few days ago. This group features the guy who rapped on the Beta Band's "Won" a few years back, and I have to say none of this album has lived up to that hype for me yet. There's definitely some rock band playing behind him (which admittedly sounds like a lost Grandaddy track) and things mesh well here. This requires a few more listens methinks.

10) Through the Walls (ft. Ric Ocasek) - RJD2
nearest I can tell this is just the album track with Ric singing over his already sampled vocal. Still, it rocks.

11)Bet You Never Thought It'd Be Like This - The Scotland Yard Gospel Choir
Slow-ish, lotsa instrumentation, make and female vocals, a little bit of yowl....my kinda song for a slowbie. I should've saved this for the end of the night when i'm throwing up for poignancy. I might have to hit up that tequila now just so's I can make that happen.