...I thought I'd purchase each and every one of you this hat or very special deck of cards.



It's a DEAL!

USS Ronald Reagan Cap

Special Sale: The USS Reagan cap retails for $24.95 —
but you can get it now for just $2.99!

Save $22 off the regular price!

Important: This Sale ENDS on
Thursday, March 1st at 5 PM EST — So Order Today!

Limit: 2 Caps Per Customer.

If you don't want the hat, I'll get you the deck of cards



The Deck of Reagan will recapture Reagan's greatness in the four suits of the deck:

The Diamonds detail Ronald Reagan's "Land of Freedom" — why Reagan believed America was great because America was free.
The Clubs offer Reagan's "American Values" — his ideas on how crucial our core beliefs as a people are to our nation and the world.
The Hearts reveal Reagan's "Wit & Humor" — with every card you'll laugh with Reagan at his favorite topics: the Democrats, communism, the big media, and even himself!
The Spades capture Reagan's "Problem of Government" — explaining why government is a threat to freedom and how it hurts more than it helps.
And the Jokers — you'll really love seeing Jimmy Carter and Walter Mondale, Reagan's two presidential opponents, and their utterly ridiculous comments.

So please PM all of your addresses.

my hatred of ol' ronnie has subsided over the years, but it burned white-hot during his heyday - my entire senior year high school civics class was spent writing one anti-reagan screed after another, much to the delight of my commie pinko civics teacher

that fall, in the first election i was of age, i immediately wasted my vote on the craptastic mondale-ferraro ticket

to this day, probably the purest and most truthful sketch ever aired on SNL...

Back in fall '99, when I was a college sophomore, I would spend my evenings discussing the content of the Howard Stern Show (as re-broadcast on E! Entertainment Television) with one of my floormates, B.L. He was an Alan Keyes booster at the time, real social conservative*, but he loved Howard. Anyway, he had just seen "The Dysfunctional Family Feud" pitting the Wack Pack (Stuttering John, Crackhead Bob, Gary the Retard) against the Penthouse Pets. One of the survey questions: We asked 100 people to name a U.S. Vice President, who did they name? The Pets rang in first & named Gore, then got two wrong, then... they mentioned... Mondale. (Yes, Mondale.) B.L. & I could not figure how Ol' Walt would be the first non-sitting VP anyone would name.

Then again, considering Eleanor Mondale could have easily been a Penthouse Pet, well...

*B.L. later came out of the closet.

When can I expect to receive mine, Dale?

I'll have them shipped out immediately.

PM sent!

So does that deck of cards only have Kings and Aces? Because I love playing Texas trickle-down poker.

genius

Does the hat come in purple?

I only want it if it has the braiding on the bill, and a picture of the ship on the front - c'mon, Dale.

you know, like this: