I went to my usual sunday night open mic last night...and saw a guy who hadn't been there in a couple of months. This guy, Jon, usually comes in with his buddy Anthony and they were weekly regulars until a couple of months ago. Then they stopped coming completely. Nobody knew why, and since a few of the regulars didn't really like Jon's style and some of them didn't care much for Anthony either, the attitude was "oh well, bollocks to them, then."

So Jon comes up to me at the bar and I say, "how you doing" and he immediately says...."you remember my friend Anthony, used to come in with me? He passed away on May 24th." It was like a punch in the gut. I had played onstage with this guy, backing him up on bass. For the most part, I liked his songwriting and style, although not all of his songs were good.

Then I find out that he had the exact same condition as Todd did. He had a cluster of blood vessels in his brain, and instead of opting for surgery, he went for chemo and some other therapy. The tumor began to get smaller. Then suddenly, with no warning, it exploded. He was in a coma for ten days....then the family opted to let him pass. Jon asked me to play with him on his set, to be dedicated to Anthony. I said I would be honored to.

This is even more eerie because I had told Todd maybe 9 months ago that this guy REALLY reminded me of him and he should stop in and play sometime, because I jokingly thought he was Todd's doppleganger. He loved Nick Lowe and Elvis Costello, and he wrote power pop and twee pop songs.

During Jon's set we played two covers they always played together, a song called "California Stars" and the Nick Lowe song "Cruel to Be Kind". I could see that Jon was really fighting back some emotion on stage and I was having a really hard time holding it together too.

I'm thinking I'm probably not going to go in today....I just feel horrible about this. The guy was only in his mid-late 30s and was in great health otherwise. He leaves behind a wife and two small children.

Remember folks, don't take a day....a minute....a fucking second for granted. Be thankful you have life and have the opportunity to do so many things every day. I know this sobering experience will make me take my life for granted less.

RIP Anthony...you'll always be part of Sunday Night.

Damn.
I remember you telling me about that guy, and I have been meaning to come in on Sunday sometime.

I'm sorry to hear about this. Please send my condolences to Jon, as well (even though he doesn't know me).

Damn dude. That's very sad. I truly am sorry about this. This makes me what to enjoy things just a little bit better as well.

Yeah, I went through all this when my younger brother was in intensive care breathing through a pump.

As far as I'm concerned everyday is the last day of your life. Every night you say goodbye to the world and every waking morning is a miracle.

California Stars is a Wilco tune from the first Mermaid Ave disc, (lyrics by Woody Guthrie). Very fitting, really. One of those songs that's 3 chords, but is instantly recognizeable because of how well it was done.

Sorry to hear about it. I had a regional boss I liked very much die about 2 years ago very suddenly. He was diagnosed with Leukemia, and then within 12 months was dead, also leaving a wife and two. Nobody within the company could believe it. I wrote his widow a letter... never met her, but he was just such a good guy.

Take the day off but don't get too overwhelmed.

Damn, that's very sad. Life is crazy like that, it comes and goes so quickly. I went through a similar realization as you, Matt, when a friend was stricken with HIV and later died of complications. His philosophy on the whole situation made me appreciate my life that much more, holding no regrets for decisions I've made. As corny as it sounds, life really should be lived to its fullest.

I hope Anthony's family gets through this painful time in their life and keep him close to their hearts always.

Thanks for your thoughts, all. I did decide to bite the bullet and come in today, even though I'm not feeling too good. I guess this is equity for later.

Wow, so sorry to hear that. And thanks for reminding me and the rest of us to cherish each and every day. It's easy to forget sometimes.

Its always horrible to hear such things, life is fleeting.. regardless of the illusion of control we tend to build around ourselves. Sorry to hear this.

damn, sorry to hear that, man. that's terrible news.

wow...sorry to hear about this spade.



i learned this at way too young an age following the death of my oldest brother (he was only 25).

but it really is an excellent thing to remember each and every day.

Thanks for sharing. I hope to take this lesson to heart.

i'll be the third person to have a sad story of leaving behind a wife and two kids. My brothers best fried got diagnosed with colon cancer at 33 and 6 months later he was dead.

a bunch of my brothers friends are putting together a soccer tournamat and some other things to raise money for his family (all the mediacl bills and the day to day troubles of raising kids)

i'm really glad they ard doing that, because it's a good way to celebrate his life, and help the lives he left behind.

I had a 'appreciate life' revelation after my mom passed....

as usualy, tanya did a good job of expressing what the rest of us couldn't quite type. i'm sorry matt.

Wow. It was nice that he asked you to join him and play some songs and help him kind of pay tribute to his friend.

Stuff like that makes you take a long look at things. My grandfather died in 2000 of cancer that came on very quickly. He was an avid gardener and I really realized how bad things were when I went to visit him at home in the fall and the garden was completely fallow and overrun with weeds. It was so not right.

Think I'm gonna throw on "California Stars" right now. Keep ya head up.