i meant to tivo it but there was a 2 hr law and order SVU EVENT at the same time that i didn't watch either.

Here's a recap of Tuesday's premiere of Britney & Kevin: Chaotic, including several things we learned about the singer and her new husband:

The setup: Shaky, Blair Witch Project-like footage interspersed with sit-down interviews with Spears.

Opening shot: A zoomed-in glance at Britney's knees in leggings: "They look like boobs, but they're not. They're my knees," Spears says, chuckling.

Britney's up-close look: Scattered blemishes, unwaxed eyebrows, a red Kaballah bracelet and occasional cigarette smoking.

Decoding Britney's unique accent: G-eye = guy; fawn = fun; e-ewe = you; dew = do; wah = why

Britney's best on-screen question: "What's your favorite sex position?"

The answers:

Felicia, Britney's assistant: "I don't know. I've never done it before."

N Sync's JC Chasez: "I like a lot of positions," he says, making sexual movements with his hips. "Not all of them, but a lot of them."

Britney: On camera, she teasingly tells her Mom, Dad and younger sister Jaime-Lynn to ignore her answer, and then says, "I'm not gonna answer that."

On meeting Kevin Federline in Hollywood: "I had my groove on, and I thought I looked kinda hot," she says. "His whole vibe was kinda sexy."

Kevin: "That night, magic happened."

On intimacy with Kevin: "Our sex is so good. Ecstasy, ecstasy, ecstasy. I've had sex three times today," she tells her staff before a concert in England.

Five more things we learn about Britney:

1. Pig faces are encouraged. Spears upturns her nose twice at the camera, accompanying both silly moments with impressions of a ditzy California valley girl.

2. She thinks Eminem is cool. The evidence: First, we hear her sing along with D-12's My Band. Later, she tells Federline, "He's a genius, but he complains a lot. But it's cool."

3. Brad Pitt? Also cool. If she could marry any celebrity, Spears says it would be Pitt. When asked what celebrity he'd like to wed, Federline replies, "none of y'all."

4. And ditto for Pink. "I think Pink is really cool," Spears declares from her makeup chair, singing along to the song Trouble. "Yes I do. Yes I do."

5. She gets "real antsy in cars." At least, that's what she tells her driver on the way to an appearance on British MTV's TRL.

5. She gets "real antsy in cars." At least, that's what she tells her driver on the way to an appearance on British MTV's TRL.

oh those boobies cuz she's preggers