I demand to portray myself, and that I be given a love scene with Angelina Jolie.
If that can't happen, then MacKauley Culkin will do as my doppleganger. He's got mad-wicked wheelchair skillz.

i'll definitely need a partner-in-crime. it is necessary to have 2 resident female drunks to wreck havoc.

well, damn... the only person I've ever been told I resemble is Erin Gray, and she's like 15 years older than me. Can we transport Erin Gray from "Buck Rogers," and then she could play me? Hell, I'd even accept "Silver Spoons"-era Erin Gray.

I live in Portland, so it's a given I'm a drunk, and a beer snob to boot. I can climb walls and ride my bike really fast. Please let me use a rocket launcher on a Hummer H2. My two dogs will attack the driver as he stumbled out of the flaming vehicle, dazed and confused.

I think "Kung Fu Fighting" by Carl Douglas needs to be featured in this movie somewhere.

Philip Seymour Hoffman, bitches!!!!

swiateck: Jolie's my astro-twin, I get first dibs. Besides, she'd like me better. celebmatch.com said so (from which shiv created a thread back in the CMJ days).

Well, pay our buddy Cheryl a visit in her new digs in the country. I guess Angelina lives just down the road. No lie.

Oh, and PSH would have to reprise his "Rain dance!" bit from "Along Came Polly". He was the only decent thing in that movie.

Okay, it's going to be sort of a Sideways-meets-Empire-Records-meets-Standalone-Complex.

It starts out, no-one's met yet, they're all just scenes of every day life as we get to know the characters, and each scene ends as they get online and go to obner.

Then, one by one, they start to meet -- we get some love interest, and some comedy.

(this is obviously not the opening) scene:

Obner #3: So, you like that new Spoon CD?
Obner #4: Yeah, it's cool.
Obner #3: Cool.
(pause)
Obner #3: You know, I kind of like that Radiohead album, Pablo Honey, it's really not that bad if you don't compare it to any of their other albums.
(awkward silence)
Obner #4: I like William Shatner.
(they both smile and take another swig of their beer)

Okay, then there's a fire at a Spoon concert that two of the obners went to, and everyone dies at the fire. And everyone on the board is reacting in different ways -- some are mourning, some are cold, some are just in shock.

Then two of the married people get killed in a car accident, and everyone starts suspecting the fire wasn't just pyrotechnics out of control.

Then one of the most frequent posters just stops posting, and no-one knows what happens to him. No-one knows his phone number or anything, so they can't call him.

Then there's this big indie festival, and several people go, and there's a big scene with Flaming Lips, and no-one gets killed, and that's the end of the movie.

I'm still working on where to put the monkey in. Probably on stage with the Flaming Lips.

I want to be played by Billy Connolly. Except he's at least 20 years older than me. Is there some younger equivalent?

Jennifer Connelly?

well "played by" would have a different application there.

I can't figure out who would play me... someone's already got McCaulay. And M J Fox is gettin so damn jittery lately I don't think he could pull it off.

picturing Mikey with your avatar's hair

...pretty much anybody/thing with that hair will get me to laugh.

And as for the monkey bit, I think Chase should be driving around with one, using it to signal for his turns, ala: