I have a Trodat 5440 date stamp. Yes! Beat that! And I can back that up with a Docubind P-100.

I'll keep back my big guns until later for tactical reasons.

BASF 4D-120m 4mm data cartridge

Haaaa-Yaaaaa!!!!

Rexel "Meteor" stapler. In dark blue metallic finish.

A Sweda basic-function calculator. Ergonomic. Silver w/ bits of purple and black. Has our company logo on it as well.

I have a HB pencil with 'North Lanarkshire Council Planning and Development' on it and which has been "been made from recycled vending cups".

A five-colour highlighter: yellow, pink, blue, orange, and green. All in one!!! It's disc shaped and, if you put the caps on sideways, vaguely resembles a starfish.

Pretty good, but I have Impega Correction Fluid, and get this, IT'S WITHOUT CHLORINATED HYDROCARBONS!

Fisco Essentials drawing pins (aka thumbtacks) for "all your stationery needs"

A Texas Instruments TI-5006 II "Super View" calculator (circa 1986)

I don't know what anything is called yet I use it everyday. Err...office equipment, that is.

I'm whack like that.

I have coloured staples -- red, blue, green, gold and the o' so bland silver. You wish you could be me.

A Panasonic KP-4A automatic pencil sharpener that I've yet to use. And probably never will.

Y'all are tricked out. I can't win this game, my chair is broken. Best I have is a pen from the National Bureau Of Economic Research. If only it was made out of excess lame assumptions...

i have a slinky and hi hi puffy amiyumi drumsticks. i use them every day.

Nothing rocks harder than OIC Standard white cubicle clips. They even come with this:

WARNING!
This product contains sharp pins.
Handle with care and keep away from children.

That's pretty punk rock...

37 PEZ dispensers - they're on my desk, which is in my office, so they count as office supplies. We've accrued an impressive array of:
superheroes - Incredible Hulk, Batman, Wonder Woman, 2 Spidermen, the baby from The Incredibles
Simpsons - the whole family plus keychain Bart
Star Wars - Darth Vader, Yoda, Chewie, a storm trooper
cartoon/Muppets characters - 2 Sylvester The Cats, Donald Duck, Garfield, Fozzy, Bugs Bunny
Halloween - 2 scarecrows, a skeleton, a pumpkin
Christmas - 2 reindeer, Santa, a snowman, a creepy looking elf

Plus some other random ones. And Darth is wearing a nurse's outfit from back when they made "clothes" for PEZ dispensers. He's even sporting a pink ribbon for breast cancer awareness.

I keep the dispensers fully loaded at all times and give the candy to kids who come into the office and wander by. My co-workers' kids love me.

You think you know efficiency?!

Not until the hp LaserJet 3330mfp printer copier scanner fax was brought into your dark, meaningless life. Machine enhances communications by providing reliable hp LaserJet printing, convenient copying, color scanning and faxing all in one device to improve productivity, save space and reduce costs. No jesting here. Read on. With professional-quality 1200 dpi laser printing, fast 33.6k faxing with a 50-page automatic document feeder, color scanning and versatile flatbed copying, the hp LaserJet 3330mfp printer copier scanner fax can help small businesses and home offices distribute and print documents efficiently and effectively without sacrificing office space.

Prints at 1200 x 1200 DPI at 15 PPM Black
Scans at 600 x 600 DPI
Copies at 15 CPM Black
Faxes at 300 x 300 DPI
Connects Via USB and Parallel(Optional)
Environments: Windows 98, 98SE, Me, 2000, Professional, XP, Mac OS 9.1, 9.2, 10, 10.1 (via network connection)

You've been served.

I have a Ideal Amplifier Probe and Tone Generator sitting right hear on my desk! Definetly not standard issue!

it's come to this, hasn't it.

I have a loupe. I also have a pica ruler.