at least for me - we have separate accounts but we both have access to each other's accounts - I can see her activity online right under my info and vice versa. we just do it mainly because all my on line bill pays are set up and I don't want to have to re-do them. things have worked out really well for us - we share money pretty much completely and have never had a fight over money.

i think people that don't live together before marrying are fucking NUTS.

Boy, I'm happy none of my female cousins and you have never crossed paths.

Same exact situation here Busty. It's worked for us perfectly so far [10 years married].

agreed - but after a point I think you should probably just break up...I would say, generally, if you have lived together for more than 5 years, you probably shouldn't get married...or probably won't ever get married. just seems to be the way things work out in my experience.

also if you ever break up with someone, and happen to get back together later, don't get married.

I gave my girlfriend a promise ring for Christmas last year, I just cannot afford an engagement ring nor pay for part of a wedding at this point in time. We have only been together now for a little over a year and a half and she has already told me she didn't want to get married until after she graduates. I understand, since I was definitely in no need to get married until I graduated too.
As for the joint account, I am guessing we would get one if her plan works out. She would prefer for me to be the only breadwinner and for her to be a stay at home mom like my mother was. I don't have a problem with it, since I pay the bills now, she just pays me for her share of expenses. If I am the one handling the purse strings and know where the money is going to before hand, I am fine with it. I just don't want to come home and find out that she bought a pair of shoes with money that I thought we were saving for a vacation.
I just tend to advocate a large bank account for family expenses and separate smaller accounts for your personal interests so you avoid the arguments about shopping, going out and crap like that.

I'm just curious. How many of the men or women on this board moved in with their partners with the understanding that they would get married?
Meaning couples who lived together as they planned their wedding.

Similar to what Jen and Josh did, I suppose.

jesus dude, that's not a very nice thing to say.....what if I wanna get married?

here is another one for you:

She can have sex with you whenever she wants.
You can have sex with her whenever she wants.

we talked about marriage before I moved in but weren't engaged...I think we both knew we were going to get married, however. We had kind of a strange situation: my wife and I met in New Orleans during a business meeting - we dated long distance for awhile, travelled back and forth, and after about 6 months I moved from SF to NC to live with her - pretty big risk on both our parts, but it was worth the risk. We lived together for 6 months, got engaged, then got married in another 8 months.

See now that I understand. But I will never get those who live together 3, 4, 5 etc, years...

sorry - didn't mean to say it never works - but with my friends at least, it has not worked out very well. amazing how many of my friends have been married and divorced (or even on their 2nd marriage) by 30. of course a lot of my friends are idiots.

my wife and i met, dated for 4 weeks, moved in together, got married 6 months later, and it's been rad ever since.

honesty, trust, great sex, good conversation, travelling <---keeps us together

hey, people (myself included) do weird shit in the privacy of their own home. These aren't things you think are very weird, but you still won't do them around a significant other who happens to be over. Once you move in is when you find out they take 6 hour baths or insist on alphabetizing everything in the fridge or some such shit. I just think it's nice to know about these little foibles BEFORE spending the rest of your life with a person, if only to alleviate being totally weirded out right a week after the weddin

Dude, no one is ever gonna figure that one out man. Once you learn to just accept shit like this, you'll be a lot better off.

I personally love this arrangment. My last gf wanted to fuck ALL THE TIME. It was fucking annoying sometimes. Yeah, sometimes I just wanna GO TO SLEEP!

My gf now rarely makes a move and I like it that way. If we make sweet love, it's cause I want to, so I'm always in the mood at the time. If she doesn't, fine. I've jerked off my whole life, another 10,000 times won't kill me.

Yup...dated (about a year or so), moved in together (2-3 years), married (10, I'll give in about 7 good ones and 3 so-so, pretty good ratio actually if you ask around and people answer honestly)

We knew we were getting married after about 6 months or so. We both pretty much figured if we could stand such constant contact with the same person for that long, going on our past experiences, this must be something really big.

that's a pretty good setup.

Although, there is a part of me that doesnt see what the big deal with getting married as long as you love each other, etc. Makes me go 'WTF?' sometimes.

That to me sounds like you're looking for excuses to not get married.

my wife is way hornier than me...its pretty insane.

This very well might be the funniest thing I've read in some time. And the truest.

aren't most women?

Holy crap, TJ, it's like you're reading my thoughts.

Money... I have the Black Ops Account (my right pocket) where any and all gig money lands, and it's mine. In addition to the regular daily routine, I play stupid songs for stupid people for 4 hours straight once a week, so I feel I've earned it. Uses for Black Ops money range from such varied endeavors as lunches, beer, bike parts, guitar strings, to the occasional surprise gift for the missus. I don't account for it, I just use it to fill in little gaps.

It most certainly makes my life easier, and is probably the biggest single reason to play this weekly gig after the generic itch to play out.



edit: actually, sometimes the songs are very, very good, but rarely does anyone enjoy them. Most people want brown eyed girl, not the sound of settling. We don't play outright crap, but the Coog does make more appearances than perhaps his talent can truly justify.

Not everyone likes to have quickies when they first wake up, like you. I can't stand to be spoken to in the morning, let alone, touched.

quickies? i can't remember the last time I had a longie. ha

damn, i guess i am perverted.