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PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2005 7:41 pm 
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Whiskey Tango
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If I had had a couple of beers I might I have invited them to pull up a rocking chair and let's sit on the porch and talk shop, but I'm not really in the mood.

Plus the kid had the crazy-eyes of a true believer.

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2005 7:52 pm 
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Yail Bloor Wrote:
Plus the kid had the crazy-eyes of a true believer.

Maybe he was silently trying to gesture for help.


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PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2005 11:48 pm 
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Yail Bloor Wrote:
Yeah, that "Jesus in North America" was always a little sketchy to me as well.


I love it when non-Mormon religious folk mock the Mormons, as if their own religions actually make sense (and I don't know if you fit into this category YB, but I'm using your quote as an example anyway).

As a non-religious American (becoming scarier and scarier by the day, BTW), who lives and works with a lot of Mormons, this irritates me.


Last edited by The Dreaded Marco on Sat Dec 31, 2005 12:50 am, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2005 12:41 am 
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DumpJack Wrote:
I think you should ask them in.


You should have offered them caffine free Coke and then switched it out for the real stuff.

:twisted:


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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2005 12:50 am 
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Three? Aren't they always in pairs?

They're up to no good.


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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2005 12:57 am 
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Keep 'em coming guys---this is pure gold.


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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2005 3:42 am 
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I'd tell them I'll listen to their 5 minutes on God if they'll listen to my 5 minutes on buttsex.


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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2005 3:49 am 
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The Dreaded Marco Wrote:
Keep 'em coming guys---this is pure gold.


Honestly, I lived in a community once that had a middling population of Mormons. Very nice people on the whole. And disproportionately good-looking. I just disagree with their doctrine and find it perfectly implausible.

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Cotton Wrote:
I'd probably just drink myself to death. More so, I mean.


"Hey Judas. I know you've made a grave mistake.
Hey Peter. You've been pretty sweet since Easter break."


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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2005 3:52 am 
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HideousLump Wrote:
I'd tell them I'll listen to their 5 minutes on God if they'll listen to my 5 minutes on buttsex.


Is that what he meant by "coming up my drive"?

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2005 4:24 am 
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Elvis Fu Wrote:
HideousLump Wrote:
I'd tell them I'll listen to their 5 minutes on God if they'll listen to my 5 minutes on buttsex.


Is that what he meant by "coming up my drive"?

Just another covert hint that Yail is who OPA's gonna out.

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2005 12:48 pm 
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Whiskey Tango
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The Dreaded Marco Wrote:
Yail Bloor Wrote:
Yeah, that "Jesus in North America" was always a little sketchy to me as well.


I love it when non-Mormon religious folk mock the Mormons, as if their own religions actually make sense (and I don't know if you fit into this category YB, but I'm using your quote as an example anyway).


No offense taken. And just for the record: I mock all religions, races, creeds, and national origins equally (kinda like the Simpsons, I suppose, only I dont have a team of writers, just a burning impulse to insult people).

This was actually the first time I had seen Mormons in the neighborhood which was why I started the thread: I was literally sitting here and up the drive they came.

When I first moved here I was visited by two(2) seperate Baptist couples and one(1) Methodist couple from area churches just seeing if I was looking for a congregation----none of them ever actually mentioned Jesus or religion or anything like that.

After essentially living in the ghetto for 10 years where nobody visits you unless they are robbing you it was a weird transition to have shit like that and like Girl Scout cookies being sold to you at your door. The burbs are different but not so bad.

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2005 12:59 pm 
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Maybe they could have settled the atheist/agnostic debate for us.


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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2005 1:24 pm 
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Two things:

1) I despise anyone making fun of another's beliefs. However, them mormons have some strange beliefs. They believe in magic underwear.

2) How the fuck did this statement roll on by with nary a comment:
OPA! Wrote:
This thread has refreshed my appetite for Mormon cock. Just sayin'.


Awesome and definetely sig worthy.

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2005 2:18 pm 
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People get visited by religious couples when you move into a neighbourhood?

"Heyyyy, lookin' to join a church, pal? We've got Sunday Services, Bibly Study on Saturdays, Teen Clubs, Pre-Teen Clubs, Youth Choir, Group Choir... H. E. Double Toothpicks, we've got a Family Summer Picnic where the minister's wife makes her famous strawberry rhubard pie that won 2nd Place at the Country Fair! Ohhh, and sometimes we talk about God too. What d'ya say? Wanna join?"

I think I'd rather hang out with the cute Mormon boys that ride their bikes and talk about what's new at Relief Society.


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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2005 2:48 pm 
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Grape Ripple Wrote:
them mormons have some strange beliefs. They believe in magic underwear.


You hearin' this, c'polka?

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Cotton Wrote:
I'd probably just drink myself to death. More so, I mean.


"Hey Judas. I know you've made a grave mistake.
Hey Peter. You've been pretty sweet since Easter break."


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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2005 4:09 pm 
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Grape Ripple Wrote:
Two things:

1) I despise anyone making fun of another's beliefs. However, them mormons have some strange beliefs. They believe in magic underwear.


Ah, yes: the fabled "temple garments".

... But, hey, Grape Ripple, I have a question. Is it still alright within the law to kill a Mormon in Missouri?


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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2005 5:11 pm 
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Whiskey Tango
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Aural Lang Syne Wrote:
People get visited by religious couples when you move into a neighbourhood?


Honestly, I think they were just trying to be nice. Again, no overt "witnessing" and its not like they ever came back.

A lot of these Protestant (especially Methodist and Presbyterian) churches in this area are more like social clubs than anything. Just a place for people to meet people. My parents, for example, go to church every week and hang out socially with their friends from there, but I've never heard any of them mention anything about religion EVER outside of asking the blessing before a meal.

Its not really as evil as all that in most cases. Just like all muslims arent blowing up airplanes and all Jews arent.....well thats true. (sorry guys :wink: )

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2005 5:20 pm 
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Yail Bloor Wrote:
If I had had a couple of beers I might I have invited them to pull up a rocking chair and let's sit on the porch and talk shop, but I'm not really in the mood.

Plus the kid had the crazy-eyes of a true believer.


Give 'em a coupla beers and they'll do awesome dances to stuff like Robert Palmer's "You Are In My System" and The Cars "Hello Again."

After a few more and a strong dose of The Fabulous Thunderbird's "Tuff Enuff" and they're doing full headspins on the Book Of Moroni.


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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2005 5:23 pm 
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By the time you get to "Love Stinks" though they're pretty bitter drunks.


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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2005 6:03 pm 
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Grape Ripple Wrote:
1) I despise anyone making fun of another's beliefs.

<----- mocking your beliefs right now.


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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2005 9:20 pm 
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Elvis Fu Wrote:
HideousLump Wrote:
I'd tell them I'll listen to their 5 minutes on God if they'll listen to my 5 minutes on buttsex.


Is that what he meant by "coming up my drive"?


Reason #1 why Fu should have been funniest Obner.


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 02, 2006 1:32 pm 
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quote="Stop Breathin'"]Odd this. My pastor and I were having a discussion last night about Joseph Smith and his "gold plates", or book of Mormon that he found in a hillside in upstate New York. Seems that their doctrine's claim relates to the 'lost' tribe of Israel and Jesus visiting North America with prophecy after his resurrection. Just doesn't make sense in the time continuum and the fact that there have been no archaelogical discoveries of people with Hebrew skull features in North America at that time. Common thought is that ole Joe liked his women, was into the occult, and was a bit of a looney.[/quote]

I forget the premise of it, but I had a teacher at one point who said that slome of this comes from the Aztec/Maya need for blood sacrifice..there was some sense to it, but I was also probably high (McIntosh HS, 1994 AP American History, right after lunch? yep HIGH)

Yail Bloor Wrote:
If I had had a couple of beers I might I have invited them to pull up a rocking chair and let's sit on the porch and talk shop, but I'm not really in the mood.

Plus the kid had the crazy-eyes of a true believer.


One of my favorite things that Bloor does is destroy Jesus freaks with wreckless abandon. And not in a "I'm louder and meaner than you"/LooGAR way, but actually sits down and disects the arguments with Milton and Dante and shit. HILARIOUS.

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I understand that you, of all people, know this crisis and, in your own way, are working to address it. You, the madras-pantsed julip-sipping Southern cracker and me, the oldman hippie California fruit cake are brothers in the struggle to save our country.

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PostPosted: Mon Jan 02, 2006 3:30 pm 
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montythemongoose Wrote:
Grape Ripple Wrote:
Two things:

1) I despise anyone making fun of another's beliefs. However, them mormons have some strange beliefs. They believe in magic underwear.


Ah, yes: the fabled "temple garments".

... But, hey, Grape Ripple, I have a question. Is it still alright within the law to kill a Mormon in Missouri?


This state does have a pretty bad reputation for that crap. In fact, I think there is a portion of a mural in the state capitol depicting the tarring and feathering of Mormons. No good.

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