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 Post subject: When does one present the eulogy?
PostPosted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 12:19 am 
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Queen of Obner

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When I gave my dad's eulogy, it was at his funeral mass. For my mom, I'm thinking of doing it at the viewing, right before or after a rosary being said in her honour. My reason behind it is because that's when she'll have the most people in attendance. Does anyone know when is the appropriate time to give the eulogy? Does it matter? Should I even care about proper funeral etiquette?


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 12:36 am 
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when my grandfather died in 2002, the eulogy was given at the wake, along with a short religious service. i really liked doing it that way. i've seen them given at the church before the funeral procession, but i don't think there's etiquette surrounding it. i think you should do it whenever it's the most comfortable for you. good luck.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 1:39 am 
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frostingspoon
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If you can, go ahead and do it at both.

The people who hear it twice will understand, I'm sure.

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PostPosted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 3:08 am 
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Queen of Obner

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I was thinking of doing it at both. I'm just not sure I'd be able to handle it emotionally.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 12:40 pm 
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frostingspoon
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That's why I said if you can.

Buck up babe, she's just resting peacefully.

No more suffering for her.

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I don't eat it every morning, I do however, pull it out sometimes.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 1:18 pm 
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Go Platinum
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we had a one night wake which turned into quite a gathering. kind of a party. it was my mom's nature. the funeral director asked us to keep it down. thank god there was no other viewing going on.

i spoke at the luncheon the next day. i was shaking the entire time but i wrote a lot of nice things and cracked a few jokes here and there. like i said, she was the life of the party and i tried to do her justice.

there's no right or wrong but i think the wake is a little less formal than at the mass and you ( and everyone else) may be a little more relaxed. after you speak you'll be surrounded by friends and family to help you get through it as opposed to having to finish mass.

i'm thinking about you a lot these days.....


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 2:36 pm 
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ayah Wrote:
i'm thinking about you a lot these days.....


Me too... while I was out riding my bike yesterday, I couldn't get over how awesome and beautiful the weather was, and I thought to myself, "Tania's mama must be here today!"


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 2:52 pm 
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Queen of Obner

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You are all so sweet. How did you know my mom loved to be out in the sunshine? Then again, who doesn't?

She used to sit outside on her lawn swing, working on her crossword puzzles, talking to the dogs and drinking her Diet Pepsi. All the neighbourhood kids would stop by and visit with her -- "Hi, Efiee! Do you want us to do something for you?" She'd quickly put them to work doing odd chores around the yard. The kids didn't care, they loved being there. After they were done, she'd make sure to give them all a hug and kiss.

One day, I hope to be as loving as her.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 3:56 pm 
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Aural Fixation Wrote:
One day, I hope to be as loving as her.


Done and DONE.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 7:45 pm 
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We buried my step-grandpa today. His oldest son gave the eulogy during the service. Everyone was too emotional to do it during the viewing.

God bless your mom. We all know she had to have been a great woman to have raised you. :)

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PostPosted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 9:20 pm 
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pollysix Wrote:
Aural Fixation Wrote:
One day, I hope to be as loving as her.


Done and DONE.


you obviously already are, tania (i hope i'm allowed to call you by your name :D ). you don't have to hope for one day because from what i know of you i can tell you have a beautiful and loving personality.


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PostPosted: Tue Feb 07, 2006 4:48 am 
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Queen of Obner

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Location: El Pueblo de la Reina de Los Angeles
Thanks, guys.

I gave the eulogy shortly following the rosary said in her honour. There had to have been a couple of hundred people squeezed into the tiny chapel. After giving business presentations for a few years now, I wasn't afraid of speaking in public. It was the emotions that were churning inside me that made me uncertain as to whether or not I'd be able to go through with it. So, I took a deep breath and began to read what I wrote. Not only did I read it in English, but I translated it into Spanish.

Fuck, what does that paragraph say? I dunno cuz my tears are blurring my vision. It was tough, but I made it through. Many commented that it was a lovely service and all had something nice to say about my mom.

I'm exhausted, emotionally drained and still have to go through tomorrow, when we bury her.

Thank you again for your wonderful support.


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