Put the dog, Hazel, out on the line this morning, around 6:00am. It was still very dark, but with the porch lights the back patio is lit well enough for her to see. I went back in, started the coffee pot and some eggs. Suddenly I was hit by that terrible smell, and I just KNEW the dog got sprayed, and bad. Fresh skunk spray has a different smell than old, roadkill skunk. It has a deeper, more earthy smell, like rotting wood, and, at first, it doesn't seem so bad - until you realize that it has just burned out all sense completely. It overpowers your sense of smell, and for hours afterward it is all you can smell, if you can smell anything at all.

I ran to the back door and looked out carefully, peeking around the door frame as if it were still spraying and might hit me through the screen. But Hazel was just sitting there, the most uncomfortable, sad look on her face. She looked like she does when her instincts trick her into doing something terribly wrong, like chew chair legs or upend the garbage can. Guilt shows so easily on a dog's face, and I felt bad I couldn't go pat her, and tell her she was a good dog, and it wasn't her fault. But there was no way in hell I was going out there... at least, not until sunrise.

Funny thing is, she didn't bark once - she must have been completely suprised by the damn beast. Now I have to give her a cold bath in the hose, and lock her in her kennel for the rest of the day. I just hope that I don't stink so badly after bathing her that people notice - I have a big meeting today at work, and don't want to stick the place up.

So how has everyone else's morning been so far?

You should have used tomato juice instead of the water.
I only got about five hours of sleep last night, so I'm sure I'll bitch about it sometime today again. I've been so used to working nights lately, that I forgot I have to get up around 5:30am when I work days.

Tomato Juice can't save you from Skunk Baxter

Awwww man, poor dog!

Poor doggie. If it's any consolation, my uncle drowned a skunk a few weeks ago. It got stuck in my grandma's groundhog trap, so he decided to put it in a bucket of water or something. He said it stared at him with the most pitiful look and he told my grandmother to never again ask him to clear the groundhog trap.

If you stink at work, wear a sign around your neck that says "Sprayed by skunk." That should keep people from asking any questions or talking shit behind your back.

My morning's been considerably less eventful than a skunk spraying. I slept on the couch last night because I couldn't make it to bed after Alfred Hitchcock Presents. Leslie Nielson in the 60's was a stud. My roommate gave me a ride to work this morning which was awesome and when I got here, I discovered that my boss did all of the class set-up for me on Friday. I love her. Good morning to all.

I remember when our husky used to get sprayed. IT SUCKED ASS. So I feel for you

they did something similar to this on "mr. show" once, except the sign didn't say anything about a skunk and the guy had to wear it all the time. funny sketch.

i rode my bike to work this morning. (i usually ride down at night, take the train in the morning, and then ride home in the afternoon.) i had to stop halfway to eat an energy bar and then it didn't really kick in at all. i felt on the verge of either throwing up or passing out for about 20 blocks. the place where i park and shower is too small for the morning rush of bicyclists. and it only took about 5 minutes off my commute. i don't really think it's worthwhile. and i left my cell phone in my locker over there.

"RAPIST BACKING UP!"

In college, one of the clusters of dorms backed up to woods. Every night and morning there would be at least 2-5 skunks wandering around different areas (mostly by the dry exhausts). I had many a friend wander home drunk and nearly step on one and get a spray. Sucks indeed.

When I was in college someone thought it would be awesome to drag some roadkill skunk and put it in the stairwell of one of the dorms. I could smell the dorm/skunk all the way on the other side of the campus in the comfort of my sanitzed and freshly febreezed dorm. I may or may not have felt bad for those in the other dorm.

Yeah, dorms are notoriously bad for funks...guys dorms in particular...and athletes even more so. My friend lived in a dorm with the football team. Some girl made the team cake, and after they had smashed it on the walls and left it, they took the rest and just threw it in the emergency stairwell...there it stayed for 3 mos.

when i was a sophmore, someone threw a fire extinguisher from the sixth floor of a stairwell. it smashed on the second or third floor. my room was across the hall from the stairwell. it was pretty bad. that started a "fire alarm between 2 and 3am every thursday or friday morning for a month" trend.