i want to go home, eat, drink, then go to see the new pixies doc. someone break me outta here

I'll call in the bomb threat.

please do it fast

tell them you feel like you're coming down with the measles. you'll be out quicklike.

that would work if i wasn't one of the last 3 people here. the other 2 won't care.

good thing i like my job though. that makes a world of difference.

absolutely. i've been sticking around later than usual lately, but it's not so bad when i actually like the work.

I no longer have a family to go home to.

while you're at it, get me out of here too. please.

set your desk on fire then pee on it to put it out. they will excuse you.

??/

Ryan, I could always show up with the baby and start screaming paternity suit at ya, that could get you out fast.

tell them you have crabs.

They left for Sweden today. I won't see them for 5 1/2 weeks until I fly over there Dec 16th.

Dude, I love my wife and kids, too, but as your spawn grow older, you'll come to appreciate that this is actually a vacation for YOU, too. Revel in the peace, quiet and freedom.

Rodney knows from experience.

Just stand up and leave, with no explanation.

If you ever get questioned about it, just give them a blank look, and say "No, I was here until 5:30."