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 Post subject: I hate it when this happens while I'm watching Porn (sfw)
PostPosted: Wed Feb 21, 2007 7:01 pm 
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Porn DVD Screams Prompt Sword 'Rescue'
By Associated Press
4 hours ago

OCONOMOWOC, Wis. - A man says he broke into an apartment with a cavalry sword because he thought he heard a woman being raped, but the sound actually was from a pornographic movie his upstairs neighbor was watching.

"Now I feel stupid," said James Van Iveren, who has been charged in the case. "This really is nothing, nothing but a mistake."

According to a criminal complaint, the neighbor told police that Van Iveren pounded on the door and kicked it open without warning Feb. 12, damaging the frame and lock.

"Where is she?" Van Iveren demanded, thrusting the sword at the neighbor, the complaint said. "Where is she?"

The neighbor told police Van Iveren became increasingly aggressive as he repeated the question, insisting that he had heard a woman being raped. The complaint said that, with the sword pointed at him, the neighbor led Van Iveren throughout the apartment, opening closet doors to prove he was alone.

The neighbor later played for police the part of the DVD he believed Van Iveren heard downstairs.

Van Iveren, 39, of Oconomowoc, was charged with criminal trespass, criminal damage and disorderly conduct, all while using a dangerous weapon, and is due in court March 5. Together, the misdemeanor counts carry a maximum sentence of 33 months in jail.

Van Iveren said Tuesday that he heard a woman "screaming for help," grabbed the sword, bounded up the stairs, kicked in the apartment door and confronted the man who lived there.

"I intended to hold it behind my back and knock. But I froze and instead, what happened happened," he told the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel.

Contesting his neighbor's account, Van Iveren said he didn't look anywhere in the apartment except the front room, and that he never threatened the neighbor with the sword.

"I had the sword extended. But that was all," he said.

Van Iveren, who lives with his mother in the downstairs apartment, said he did not call police when he heard the noises because he does not have a telephone. He said he barely knew the upstairs tenant.

Police seized Van Iveren's sword, which he said was a family heirloom.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Feb 21, 2007 7:03 pm 
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Gives new meaning to swordfight.

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 21, 2007 7:05 pm 
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Wear headphones fr yr porn, dude.


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PostPosted: Wed Feb 21, 2007 7:12 pm 
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interestingly, the neighbor is never named. i wonder if the girl in the pornographic film was actually being play-raped or if she was just, um, generously vocal.


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PostPosted: Wed Feb 21, 2007 7:22 pm 
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my fair lady im hear to rescue you with my sword

get away from this horrible creep
and ride away into the sunset with me
my mom is making meatloaf downstairs

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 21, 2007 7:53 pm 
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The kind of shit happens to Spider-Man all the time.


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 Post subject: Re: I hate it when this happens while I'm watching Porn (sfw
PostPosted: Wed Feb 21, 2007 7:56 pm 
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F**k You Dave Wrote:
Van Iveren, who lives with his mother in the downstairs apartment


Ok, so this is somebody who posts here, right?

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 21, 2007 8:07 pm 
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I read that article earlier today and could not stop laughing!


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 Post subject: Re: I hate it when this happens while I'm watching Porn (sfw
PostPosted: Wed Feb 21, 2007 8:22 pm 
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Yail Bloor Wrote:
F**k You Dave Wrote:
Van Iveren, who lives with his mother in the downstairs apartment


Ok, so this is somebody who posts here, right?


Well, the aftermath of this incident does coincide with monty's hiatus. Is Oconomowoc a suburb of Milwaukee, by any chance?

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 21, 2007 9:14 pm 
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Z Wrote:
interestingly, the neighbor is never named. i wonder if the girl in the pornographic film was actually being play-raped or if she was just, um, generously vocal.


yeah, I couldn't help but wonder what the guy was watching.


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PostPosted: Wed Feb 21, 2007 9:14 pm 
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frostingspoon
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Quote:
he did not call police when he heard the noises because he does not have a telephone


but he has a sword?
Way to have priorites, dude.


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PostPosted: Wed Feb 21, 2007 10:33 pm 
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pollysix Wrote:
Z Wrote:
interestingly, the neighbor is never named. i wonder if the girl in the pornographic film was actually being play-raped or if she was just, um, generously vocal.


yeah, I couldn't help but wonder what the guy was watching.


normal, non-rape porn can get pretty loud.

i thought that this thread was gonna be about suddenly they show the dude's face on screen when you're about to jizz.

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PostPosted: Thu Feb 22, 2007 12:05 am 
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shiv Wrote:

I thought that this thread was gonna be about suddenly they show the dude's face on screen when you're about to jizz.



:lol:

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 Post subject: Re: I hate it when this happens while I'm watching Porn (sfw
PostPosted: Thu Feb 22, 2007 12:17 am 
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FT Wrote:
Yail Bloor Wrote:
F**k You Dave Wrote:
Van Iveren, who lives with his mother in the downstairs apartment

Ok, so this is somebody who posts here, right?

Well, the aftermath of this incident does coincide with monty's hiatus. Is Oconomowoc a suburb of Milwaukee, by any chance?

it's not very close. and the guy in the picture doesn't look much like monty anyway. still, interesting development.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Feb 22, 2007 12:37 am 
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Second Album Slump

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I had neighbors with some fairly icky porn taste for a while, and almost called the cops on 'em once before I twigged. It was the rewind that gave him away.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Feb 22, 2007 12:47 am 
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bluejayway Wrote:
I twigged.


Consider me ignorant....I really don't know what that means.


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 22, 2007 1:35 am 
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umm, the penny dropped. I figured out that the violence was evidently simulated. at least was recorded - hope simulated.


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 22, 2007 9:20 am 
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this thread could have been about a ridiculous variety of things...

roommate walking in was one of my most dreaded ones back in the college days

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