So after 13 years, I just got back in touch with an ex of mine last night. Strangely enough it seemmed like we had never even lost touch, minus the stories. The laughs were still there, and we had a nice chat. We're planning on meeting up at some point to catch up on everything.

I dunno if I'm really nervous about it, but I can imagine some emotions will come back once we see eachother.

Any of you ever been in this situation? Got a story to tell?

Btw, I'm definitely not looking to dive back in with her, but it was great to hear from her again, even though she expressed love for Avril Lavigne.

Certainly nothing for that length of time with no contact, but I'm still friends with one of my exes. We see each other once every few years, and it's still just to touch base about things over MSN also. Was weird for a while early on, but it settled down.

Enjoy the sex while it lasts.

Thanks to the majesty of the internet, I'm now back in touch with my girlfriend from Grades 1, 3, and 5. And she from 2 and 4, mind you. But the former is now an orthodox Jew with two kids in Jersey.

I've managed, for better or worse, to stay in touch with all the few girls I've had anything significant with, be they in town or across the country, or in another country and working to preserve David Byrne's film library.

I wouldn't be nervous about it, Dalen. You're gonna make her fall in love with you again. And then you'll say no thanks.

I literally BUMPED INTO an old girlfriend about 10 years ago, when I was walking to work from the El one day. My head was down and apparently so was hers and we crashed into each other. We looked up and... what the fuck?!?!?!

I ended up working for a brief time with a girl I "dated" in the third grade. It was odd because I hadn't seen her in about 17 years.

I think the timeframe makes it easier to interact, etc. I think I'd be somewhat worried about similar feelings arising again, depending on how the relationship ended anyway. But overall nothing to scary.

While in Target last weekend, I successfully avoided a girl I dumped 8 years ago. Wow, was she ever lazy.

I had ex sex a couple of years ago...she quit shaving...and while the sex wasn't bad, it was still kinda gross.

My ex from high school found me on myspace back in the fall(?). It was great to hear from her - she cracks me up, and I was pretty worried about her when I lost contact ten years ago. We emailed a good bit, and talked on the phone once or twice, and it kinda made my day to hear that she's alright, has a good job and a kid, even if she's going through a divorce.

We had soft plans to get coffee or something when we were down in ATL for christmas, but there wasn't time. And I didn't call her because we hadn't even agreed on a time or a day, and then we left for New Zealand. Now she won't answer my emails - I wrote and voicemailed an apologie in January, because I felt really bad for not calling. Then I wrote again a week or two ago, just to be sure... I know she's busy, but so am I.

It was nice to hear from her, but me and mine come first.

I live 1/4 of a mile from my first boyfriend from high school (who I had vaguely kept in touch with through maybe 8 different countries between the two of us). It's nice, all our friends think it's hysterical that we were a couple, and we tell embarassing stories about each other. Another guy I dated for a few months after years of friendship, we get on fine - after a few years of not talking to each other at the time.

Everyone else I've dated is pretty much dead to me, and I'm ok with that.

i keep having connections to my ex and i really really wish i didn't.

one time
i had an
ex request
to meet up
with me
after about
six months
of not
talking to me
...
her purpose was
to tell me
that she drank herself
a miscarriage
of our baby
...
that she never
told me about

crazy bitch

Jesus. One more reason I'm glad I'm a girl. That shit never, ever happens.

I've been smart enough to burn all bridges with my exes with the exception of my ex-husband. He's okay, but I can tell that this "friendship" won't last much longer.


Dalen, why'd you guys break up?

it was weird. one day we just decided that we were just friends, and our interests weren't the same. never bad blood, but just the drift.

after getting back in touch, we're definitely different people.

Burn them bridges down. Too hard to guarantee that both people are on the same page.

catswilleatyou is the smartest person in & wins thread.

red is the only other intelligent person in thread.

my ex from 5 years ago is one of my best friends to this day. it wasn't easy at first and we went through hell but now all the bullshit aside, his friendship means more to me than most.

i'm friends with a couple of other ex's but i don't really have much in common with them anymore so we don't bother. now that i moved 3000 miles away, i really don't have to worry about bumping into an ex.

if it was 13 years ago, i wouldn't be nervous, it could be a good thing.

Yeah, something like what she said. Despite some ups and downs over the few years and periods of not talking, one of my ex's and I have become a lot closer as friends and lately he's one of the best friends I have. And have ever had. Cool thing is my husband is totally ok with it.

A lot of maintaining relationships with ex's depends on the maturity level of both people involved, how the relationship ended and if there's still some sort of connection.

If you're determined NOT to be friends then it sure as hell won't work. Unless it was a really ugly breakup then I don't see why people can't be friendly with one another. After all, you were together for a reason in the first place. Life's too short to write some people off just because you didn't work out romantically.

I mean sure there are some ex's I'd certainly wish to never see again. But others, we had some things or friends in common and if we run into each other it's not a bad thing.

"first girl I ever loved
I don't recognize
her nose is bent,
her frame is smashed,
she's covered in flies.
Everyone I ever loved
I'll love till I die."

I know what all my exes are up to because of mutual friends. But I have ZERO desire to ever talk to any of them ever again. I've ran into a couple but it's just been polite conversation. All my friends are guys and I like it that way.

Nope, I never did the "friends with ex's" route. Didn't think it was necessary, and while I dated some really wonderful guys (and some not so wonderful ones), I've got enough friends in my life that I don't need to maintain that relationship afterwards. I'm not saying that it's bad to maintain friendships, I just never felt the need to. That could change though.

I do wonder about some of my ex's, one in particular I dated back in like 1989. Amazingly kind and thoughtful man, and sometimes I wonder why I broke up with him to begin with.

I've run into long lost friends at random places though... ran into a guy I've known since 2nd grade at a beer festival out here (neither of us knew the other lived here). Through him, I reconnected with another guy I went to highschool with (remember, I grew up in Georgia). I've been able to maintain friendships with both of them, even though both are now living in Australia and Spain, respectively.

my wife and I went out to drinks with a guy from work and his wife. they told us that 2 of their friends (married couple) would be joining us later. then my friend Dan showed up and sat down. anyway, when this other couple shows up, turns out it was my ex girlfriend with her new husband.

very awkward. especially since my friend Dan had horribly insulted her at a college party one time.

we all left in about 10 minutes.

Yes, I did this over Thanksgiving and Christmas. I reconnected with my old HS/early college girlfriend of 4 years. I had been feeling guilt for the past 6 years over how I broke up with her, so I finally apologized. After that pressure was lifted off my shoulders, like you said, it was like we had never lost touch at all. The emotions weren't really there, but there was this kind of feeling of "Yeah, I know you REALLY well." In fact, this girl is probably the person that knows me better than anyone.
We now e-mail back and forth nearly every day of the week. She's dating someone long-distance and is trying to figure out where to move (finishing her Masters/looking for a job). I'll run into her again at my 10-year HS reunion in a month.

I can relate to the nervousness/excitement of seeing her again.

I see my most recent ex all the time due to our dog and the fact that we share a few friends. We went to Neko Case together and still hangout occassionally. We've talked about dating again, minus the living together. I don't think either of us were really ready to take on anothers financial problems and enjoy solitary living a bit too much.