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 Post subject: NFL Team Rankings and Predictions as STAR WARS characters
PostPosted: Fri Aug 24, 2007 3:05 am 
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Cutler Apologist
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http://18to88.com/Articles/starwars2007.htm




AFC EAST


New England Emperor Palpatine

Image

12 - 4


Keeps Darth Vader (below) on a tight leash. Used to be terrifying, but now is just old and wrinkled.


New York Darth Maul

Image

10 - 6


The threatening apprentice. Knows what he's doing, but will still end up sliced in half at the bottom of a reactor shaft.


Buffalo Biggs

Image

6 - 10


He was right there until the end, then he blew up.


Miami Jar Jar

Image

5 - 11


Bumbling moron.






AFC NORTH

Baltimore The Death Star

Image

12 - 4


Incredible defense against a large scale attack, but has a tendency to implode.


Pittsburgh Sebulba

Image

10 - 6


Wins a lot of pod races, but has been known to cheat. The shot at another title was undone by an ugly crash.


Cincinnati Crix Nadine

Image

10 - 6


Imprisoned, but he broke out just in time to lead a major offensive.


Cleveland Jawas

Image

3 - 13


They are small, brown, and constantly trading for junk.





AFC SOUTH


Colts Luke Skywalker

Image

12 - 4


You aren't sure he is going to get it done in the end, but you can't imagine the story ending any other way.


Jaguars Salacious Crumb

Image

10 - 6


Sort of menacing at first glance, but easily defeated by lesser heroes.


Houston Bantha

Image

6 - 10


Slow moving herd animals who are easily mastered.


Tennessee Admiral Piett

Image

6 - 10


Competent leadership that is constantly failed by its underlings.





AFC WEST

Chargers Darth Vader

Image

14 - 2


Very frightening, but never lived up to its incredible potential.


Denver Admiral Ackbar

Image

9 - 7


A brilliant strategist who always seems to fall into traps.


Kansas City Taun Taun

Image

6 - 10


You have to be careful because they'll let you ride them to death.


Oakland Storm troopers

Image

3 - 13


They may look tough, but they aren't.





NFC EAST

Dallas Young Obi-Wan

Image

11 - 5


Has talented protégées, but it all could go horribly wrong.


Philadelphia Mace Windu

Image

10 - 6


Nearly defeated the Emperor. (Also McNabb would look badass wielding a purple lightsaber.)


New York

8 - 8 Princess Leia

Image


Sibling of the chosen one.


Washington Jabba

Image

7 - 9


Rich and bloated.





NFC NORTH

Chicago Anakin

Image

12 - 4


Brash and talented, but has no arm.


Minnesota Mon Mothma

Image

6 - 10


Really, really boring.


Green Bay Yoda

Image

6 - 10


Green and 800 years old.


Detroit

6 - 10 Admiral Ozzel

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"He is as clumsy as he is stupid."





NFC SOUTH

New Orleans Wedge

Image


12 - 4

His presence is nearly inexplicable, but he's going to be there in the end.


Carolina Millennium Falcon

Image

7 - 9

A favorite of everyone's, but may break down at exactly the wrong time.


Tampa Bay The Naboo Squadron

Image

3 - 13


Lots of pilots, none of them any good.


Atlanta Han Solo frozen in carbonite

Image

2 - 14


You couldn't be more screwed.




NFC WEST

Seattle The planet Kamino

Image

10 - 6


Wet, rainy and wet.


St. Louis Kit Fisto

Image

9 - 7


Impressive looking warrior who is too easily defeated by the dark side.


Arizona Slave Princess Leia

Image


9 - 7

Always the sexy pick, but ends up choking you to death.


San Francisco Bail Organa

Image


6 - 10

A rich lineage in formal attire.







:lol:

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Aug 24, 2007 6:07 am 
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Indie Debut
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Biggs, eh? At least we got the porn 'stache working for us.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Aug 24, 2007 9:51 am 
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frostingspoon
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Thanks for the effort rami, but the original link is easier to read.


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 Post subject: Re: NFL Team Rankings and Predictions as STAR WARS characters
PostPosted: Fri Aug 24, 2007 11:07 am 
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Hair Trigger of Doom

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south pacific Wrote:
Cleveland
Jawas
They are small, brown, and constantly trading for junk.

Tennessee
Admiral Piett
Competent leadership that is constantly failed by its underlings.

Chicago
Anakin
Brash and talented, but has no arm.

Green Bay
Yoda
Green and 800 years old.

Arizona
Slave Princess Leia
Always the sexy pick, but ends up choking you to death.


Man, that's some GENIUS, right there. And I'm on board with them having Dallas win the NFC East at 11-5, but looking at their schedule, I'm leaning toward 12-4.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Aug 24, 2007 11:09 am 
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I liked this better when it was college teams compared to rappers.

Also, points subtracted for acknowledging the existence of the second trilogy.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Aug 24, 2007 11:10 am 
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frostingspoon
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Sen. Wm. Zanzinger LooGAR Wrote:
I liked this better when it was college teams compared to Simpsons characters.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Aug 24, 2007 11:26 am 
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Sketch Wrote:
Sen. Wm. Zanzinger LooGAR Wrote:
I liked this better when it was college teams compared to Simpsons characters.


I remember the one with college basketball COACHES compared to Simpsons characters. Kelvin Sampson was Dr. Hibbert. Would that make Tubby Smith Carl?

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Aug 24, 2007 6:44 pm 
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Go Platinum
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I would have to look half of these characters up. If I cared.

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PostPosted: Fri Aug 24, 2007 6:47 pm 
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Gayford R. Tincture

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Sen. Wm. Zanzinger LooGAR Wrote:
Also, points subtracted for acknowledging the existence of the second trilogy.


Also, there are some really obscure characters from the originals on there. That is one nerdy list.


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PostPosted: Fri Aug 24, 2007 6:56 pm 
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Like Marge, I don't know anything about football, but this is hilarious.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Aug 24, 2007 7:18 pm 
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old & wrinkled?

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