Fixed.

and, despite their protestations, those dudes were obviously not straight

I usually don't see myself in a mirror until sometime after lunch

having short hair makes that a lot easier.

I've always wanted straight pubes. Do they make an iron for this?

same one. Just don't drink coffee first.

oh and yeah, she sometimes tries shit like that. Not a fucking flat iron or anything, but things I'd lump in the "froo froo" category. I just think about my dad's side of the family, the redneck side, and draw a line in the sand.







and then give in.

Fuck do you work, catswilleatyou?

yep...i work
great performance evaluations too


i 'unno

my boss asked me if people can marry their first cousins?

Don't leave us hangin'.
What'd you tell him?

In New York, the answer is yes.

There was a question about this in Savage Love today. He said that it's legal in all states to marry your second cousins and it's legal in 26 states to marry first cousins.

i told him it wasn't legal

he asked why

i said because the state doesn't understand love

Woman I work with, her sister moved to Florida specifically so that she and her cousin could get married.

this thread makes me laugh.....

cats - you kill me

oh shit, he's on a roll now

"from now on, no one is allowed to eat whole bananas here,
they look too much like a penis
if you have to eat a banana, you can go to the break room and cut them up"

Comment, then a question.

Comment: You should spend like two hours in the break room finely slicing a banana. If he gives you shit for it, just tell him you're being extra careful to not offend anyone.

Question: What caused him to issue such an edict? Is there a lawsuit of some sort floating about?

I think we can safely assume the threat of litigation does not often trouble cats's boss.

Also, the large image of the masturbating girl in your sig makes scrolling through threads where you post a lot kind of tedious.

i have no idea why he says these things

i think im going to test the new banana rule
find out if he means what he says

you should bring in dried bananas, crush them into a fine powder, and then snort them.

pro: im leaving work in 5 minutes
con: work boner

please say it's fake

man exiting conference room next to my office, looking at UGA sticker on my office window: "Georgia has a college? (chuckle, snicker, etc)"

squirrgle - "you know, you're close enough for me to hit with this coffee mug from here."

guy - "No, I'm just kidding. I just love picking onthe smaller schools."

squirrgle - "What school did you go to?"

guy - "Tulsa."

squirrgle - "...did that meeting in there serve alcohol just now?"




What the goalie caught:
"Do you even have an office to put your Tulsa sticker on?"
"Do they even make Tulsa stickers?"

ha!

My goalie is doing a fantastic job today too.

the boss finally botched up a deal by making a gay joke to a gay man
(within the first two minutes of meeting him)

and
someone in the next group of cubes has "because i got high" as a ringtone


three resumes sent today and counting