Objective

The aim is to get rid of all your cards as soon as possible. The last player left with cards is called the scum, asshole, or whatever term of derision is locally used.
Players and Cards

About 4 to 7 people using a standard 52 card pack. The suits are irrelevant and the cards rank, from high to low, 2 A K Q J 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3.
Deal

The game is played clockwise. All the cards are dealt out. Some players may have one more than others.
Play

The player to dealer's left starts by leading (face up) any single card or any set of cards of equal rank (for example three fives). Each player in turn must then either pass (i.e. not play any cards), or play face up a card or set of cards which beats the previous play.

A single card is beaten by any higher single card. A set of cards can only be beaten by a higher set containing the same number of cards. So for example if the previous player played two sixes you can beat this with two kings, or two sevens, but not with a single king, and not with three sevens (though you could play two of them and hang onto the third).

It is not necessary to beat the previous play just because you can - passing is always allowed. Also passing does not prevent you from playing the next time your turn comes round.

The play continues as many times around the table as necessary until someone makes a play which everyone else passes. All the cards played are then turned face down and put to one side, and the player who played last (and highest) to the previous "trick" starts again by leading any card or set of equal cards.

For example the play might go:

A B C D E
44 Pass Pass 66 99
JJ Pass Pass Pass KK
Pass Pass AA Pass Pass
Pass Pass

C then starts again by leading any card or set.

When a player whose turn it is to play has no more cards left, the turn passes to the next player in rotation. Therefore in the example, if the two aces were C's last two cards, it would then be D's turn to play anything.
Social Status

The first player who is out of cards is awarded the highest social rank - for Americans this is President - the next is Vice-President, then Citizen and so on down. The last player to be left with any cards is known as the Beggar, Scum, Asshole or by various terms of abuse. For Europeans the ranks can be King, Minister, ... , Peasant or Boss, Foreman, Worker, Bum.

If keeping score, the players get points depending on their position - for example 2 for the President, 1 for the Vice President and nothing for the others. More importantly, the players of higher status are entitled to enjoy and generally abuse their power over the lower ranking players.

For the next hand the players move seats. The President selects the most comfortable chair, the Vice President sits to the President's left, and so on around to the Asshole who sits to the President's right, probably on a crate or packing case.

The Asshole is responsible for shuffling, dealing and clearing away the cards when necessary. As the players are now seated clockwise in order of rank, the first card is dealt to the President, the second to the Vice President, and so on down.

When the deal is complete, the Asshole must give his highest card to the President, and the President gives back in exchange any card which he does not want.

The President then leads any card or set of cards and the game continues as before.
End of Game

If scoring, set a target and the game ends when someone reaches (say) 11 points.
Variations in playing procedure

I'll clue you into something here, jocko, you were like Lawrence Taylor playing against a Pop Warner offense. Did you not drink at all? Why even play Asshole if you ain't drinking?

My friend would always play it and drink Tropicana Twister just because everyone else was playing, so he would be left out otherwise.

And wait, Bort was on crack?

The dude who wrote them was probably drunk when he wrote them.
Which is why I posted it.

Basically, on two ends of a ping pong table/door/piece of plywood, you set up 6 or 10 cups like bowling pins. Each team tries to throw a ping pong ball into the other teams cups. If you make it, the other team drinks that cup. First team to get the other team's cups wins, and the losing team drinks the winning team's remaining cups.

Edit: If your team doesn't make a ball during the game, you do a naked lap around the outside of the house. If both team members make their balls in on one series of throws, the balls come back and they throw again. If you bounce a ball into a cup, that counts as two. If you knock a cup over, it counts against you. Blowing the ball out of the cup is what girls do.

Yeah. Like that. The other dude was using paddles and had lots of personal rules.

--
np: Old 97's "Alone So Far"

Yeah, I've played this version. I have friends who have played the version of beer pong that includes paddles, and they refer to this game as Beirut. I use the two names interchangably, but I think this is not the original beer pong.

Ahh, Asshole and Beer Pong. My two favorite games back in the day. I think I literally spent the entire year of 2003 drunk. I worked at this huge liquor store (24,000 square feet) and all the employees would buy a keg and head over to the lesbian's house for a big drunk fest.

We were such lousy drunks that when customers would return half-empty kegs, we'd throw it back in the cooler then bring it out to the apartment complex pool and play Asshole. Good times.

as a fourth year college student, i have seen my fair share of beer pong, asshole, flip cup, and kings. at this point, i haven't decided if i've outgrown these stupid games, but nonetheless, i will play them, and drink accordingly.

although if you get matched up with me in flip cup i will own you.

Was always a fan of kings...it required thought..no wonder we rarely played it in comparison to the others. And why would you outgrow these games? Hell, I played asshole not toolong ago (with lines, not beers...try that on for aaaah), got destroyed playing flip cups at a party within the past year...

If you get too cool for school you become boring.

Thou hast not played a drinking game until thou hast played drinking backgammon.

Equipment:

one complete backgammon set, including the doubling cube
two 64 oz. cups (hence the need for ye olde doubling cube)

Best to play in a room with an unobstructed passage to either the bathroom or the backyard.

What the fuck.

Beirut is beer pong without paddles you dipshits.

And what the fuck kind of asshole rules are those?

Asshole is a drinking game. This isn't fucking badminton where you play to 11 points.

A "2" is not only the highest play, it also automatically "clears"

4 of any card is a drinking social. Completing a "social" clear the deck.

Failure to call "last card" means you are automatically asshole next round.

If you are not the last one out and you hold on to a "2" you can pass to any other player to get out.

Asshole gives 2 best cards to president in exchange for 2 worst cards before the round begins. Vice asshole gives worst card to vice president before the round.

We also play 6 is a "fuck you" you can play it on anything, and say "Fuck you, ____" and that person drinks.

Also, doubles on doubles, triples on triples...

and playing the same card as the last one "skips" the next player.

the official beer pong league buddy icon:



http://www.nbpl.net/images/nbplani.gif

That's how I play too, but I wasn't gonna type shit out. So I just googled it and copied the first thing I found. Asshole.

Every drunk has their rules of play and will fucking defend them to the end of fuckedy time.

--
np: XTC - "I Remember The Sun"

Anyone play the vegetable game?

i always thought of beer pong as more of a drinking sport, and have seen people call the same game beirut(although in northern ny sometime they throw bottle caps)

my favorite asshole rule was when the asshole had to sit in a shopping cart with a football helmet on.

Just name the time and place.

Which makes it... not beer pong. Beer pong is basically rules one through 9 on spoon's list. Ping Pong + cup hits are a drink + getting the ball in your cup is a chug. It's not that hard folks.

big fan of beer pong. i've only ever played it at dartmouth when we do shows there, but that's often enough...

KPH

i've never heard of playing beer pong with paddles. seems like it would take too long. anyway, i think that there's a tournament here on friday and i think that it's already too short a timeframe to get the proper souvenir shirts made, although i will contine working on this issue.

I stopped playing Beer Pong after I discovered hitting on chicks.

once you get a chick you'll yearn for the days of pong. and silence.