a $3 shoe horn. how much am i pushing my luck with this? i think that it's pretty funny.

Sounds like a recipe for an evening on the couch.

i also paid for her wisconsin cheese on saturday. is that not enough?

well, uh, if she's into shoes...she'll, erm, dig it.

you must think highly of her chase.

well, shipping was like $2 too.

Would you be happy if she got you that? That's usually a good guage. And not like "theoretically, I would be amused," but "it's my actual birthday and I actually got ONLY this from my future spouse."

she's done it before, and i was not impressed.

i voted "she'll be mad pleased".

my wife would.
see, the idea (and it has been successful for me) is to lower expectations to the point that a shoe horn for her birthday should elicit such a response as "Ohhhh, thank you so much honey! And it's red, too. Almost my favorite color." Then you're on cruise.

So it's about revenge, is it? Be careful what sort of precident you set, here.

Oh well if it's payback then damn the torpedoes/relationship.

well, partially, but also she knows that we just got back from a more or less crap vacation (save for seeing you dudes, natch) that she wanted, so it's kind of mocking the fact that i spent too much money on that.

this is near-genius. although if her standards get any lower than i may have to lower her daily dosage of gin.

Just be careful that you don't "subtle" your way into one hell of a cold shoulder, if you care. And it was damn good cheese, right? See, we coulda turned that vacation around, if we'da had more time.


Alas...

i dunno if we bought the right stuff. i mean, it's good, but it's cheese. is there like a specialty cheese that i should have gotten? i did buy some wisconsin maple syrup for $22 a bottle that was probably a mistake, but i got it to the counter and didn't want to wuss out and act like i was afraid to pay that for maple syrup.

I realize you aren't married yet but there is no time like the present to come to grips with the fact that there is no longer any such thing as "your" money-whether she works or not.

Practice:
Our bank account
Our credit cards
Our taxes

etc, etc, etc...

I can't even remember what it was like to have my own account, and I got married in June. I also can't remember the last time I entertained a notion as crazy as buying a $3 shoehorn for her birthday present. I don't even look at my pay stubs anymore... happier never seeing them. To be 100% honest, I don't actually know what I earn an hour here, seriously. I know what ballpark it's in, but my actual hourly rate is a mystery to me. And it doesn't matter anyway. It goes in OUR account to pay OUR bills.

does anyone really use a shoe horn? Are people's shoes that tight?

I didn't get hardly shit for my b day.
I didn't leave the fiance but I haven't let him forget it either.

oh c'mon. go for it.
don't be a schlub.
sweep her off her feet with something fabulous.
overwhelm her.
trust me. that's (a part) of what women love.

ok, i stepped it up a notch and added these two:


AND put them on the bike myself!

i am awesome.

Throw in a nice dinner (cook it if you wanna go cheap) and you're gonna be ok.

See, now you're thoughtful

Way to not be a schlub!