Is this one of those deals where your balls are in her purse, or do you normally eat pretty healthy?

<--- my wife would have my balls in her purse if she weren't so grossed out by the idea of having balls in her purse next to goldfish crackers and germ soap.

The latter. We don't eat too differently anyway, and if it makes her happy then it's no skin off my nuts. But I will miss beer for 4 days. I like to think I won't miss beer That Much for 4 days, but it is nice to crack one open when I walk in the door. meh.

I'd eat 3 Hungry Man XXL's before I'd even TASTE that shit. I wouldn't even thaw them out first.

I'm a little scared. I may photograph it.

Kale isn't bad when there is a shitload of salt or butter on it, but I can't imagine a salty smoothy.

I did some recon work at the supermarket this week but I wanna swing by Wal Mart and maybe a low rent grocery store so I can see the full range of possibilities in my area.

Are the 1 LB OF FOOD Hungry Man meals too small for this exercise?

The regular portion (1 pounders) Hungry Man deals are good for training purposes.

If it's just the normal 1 pounder I think you gotta pair it with something else, ala Shiv, TGI Friday chicken poppers or whatever.

I've looked, but I haven't seen any xxl meals in any of the grocery stores in my area, and the meals are more expensive then I thought they would be

So, you don't have a spare fin in your pocket? Dig around in the couch- there's bound to be 5 bucks hiding in there somewhere.

..how much were you picturing? $2?

Eat several of the banquet ones in the skinny red boxes. Those are pure garbage and clock in at about $1 each.

This is a pretty good list of food chemistry fit for a weekend bulemic bender:

http://eatthis.womenshealthmag.com/content/20-worst-supermarket-foods-america?article=1&page=1

At least we all picked the right brand.

5 Krispy Kreme's? Childs play.

I thought 6 was just the Beginner's Starter Kit.

Of course, those people are missing the point. 5 deep-friend and candied doughnuts are like fucking carrots compared to the sodium those meals are rocking, plus the additives. I've eaten an entire box of Tim Horton's doughnuts on the road and it just made me want to drive fast. That Hungry Man meal put the fear in me.

Probably $3, I was figuring that the quality was so low that the prices would be too. I guess I failed to take into consideration the quantity, one whole pound of crap.

Wife's Detox Diet

The lunches are easy. Tuna steaks, salmon and brown rice, black beans, greens... really not any different than normal. It's dinnertime when Things Get Wierd.

So this smoothie, they want you to blend avacado, kale, mango, coconut juice (with pulp!), almond milk, and sweet agave extract syrup. There may have been more, but if so I missed it.

The solids:



Plus the liquids:



...and then she had to take the blender out into the stairwell, because the baby was sleeping and that shit's loud as hell. So she came back in for The Reveal, and I was greeted with this:






If you're thinking "That looks like guacamole" you're right (and you're kind). Thinner, sweeter, non-spicey guacamole. Those avacados sorta take over everything else with that fatty, smooth texture. Drinking it was very, very odd, but not unpleasant. It again tastes like you're drinking really thin guac, but with a faintly sweet taste to it. I kept thinking "fuck I need a beer" as well as "Man this could really use a side of kettle chips, anything with some texture." But alas, both are temporarily verboten. The kale gets pretty well chopped up in there and obliterated into small pieces, which get stuck in every corner of your teeth afterwards. I expected this to act like Colon Blow, starting a riot that would storm its way down my GI tract in proper Scorched Earth fashion, taking everything in its path, but really not much happened. I was almost let down when I didn't wake up at 2am with The Countdown. I guess I expected that because it's a detox diet, and they have you eating some sort of cocamamie smoothie for dinner with kale in it... it MUST be to clean your clock, right? But no. Just some smooth, green, mildly pleasant goo.

So it wasn't difficult, but it wasn't something you'd ever just decide you'd like to eat, you know, because it tastes good. Aaaand I get to eat it 3 more nights. I'm 50/50 on whether I'd take those TGI Fiday's chicken nuggets over one of these. I'm POSITIVE I'd take the green goo over a Hungry Man.

Sweet Mary, Joseph, and all the saints, that looks like the aftermath of a gall bladder attack.

That smoothie is the nastiest looking shit that I have ever seen.

tempting fate there Leon.

Cap'n, you're helping me diet too, cuz I just lost my appetite looking at that thing.

I needed to make space in my freezer and fridge so my intake yesterday was:

32 (16 whole) fried chicken/buffalo wings
1+ lb potato salad
half carton of ice cream

and just cause I was still hungry
halfa roll of oreos

I just purchased a 20 lb jug of corn oil this weekend for deep frying with plenty of foods for such.