[backstory]

i was in a band with a guy in the mid 90s who was an unwitting/undiagnosed mental case. he wrote some pretty amazing lyrics, as those types are wont to do, but when the band broke up he went off the deep end, wrote death threats and set his apartment on fire.

he now lives at the mission and gets doped up pretty regularly, but occasionally, like now, he'll find one of our phone numbers and start to fixate. dude has a lot of anger issues. i mean a lot. example: when we were in middle school, we had to make a card for our moms for Mothers Day. his depicted an axe buried in a human head.

so, now he's started fixatin' once again. this time with my phone number.

[/backstory]


"zoiks"

board, if i don't post for more than 30 minutes....call the authorities

just promise him that you're getting the band back together.

post a pic of him.

he looks like this but younger, fatter and more hatier

"Let all the poisons that lurk in the mud hatch out."

-Tiberius Claudius Caesar Augustus Germanicus-

toots get outta town

Kill him first

you are so fucked

i get dibs on your login

If you're really serious you can call the phone company and have his calls blocked.

It's a small cost per month but you could do it until he stops eating hater-tots.

Does he know where you live?

no way dude

it's getting bequeathed to:

eh, he has no idea where i live. and being that he has no car, and i live out in the sticks, the chances of him showing up on my doorstep with a stomach growling for me brains is kinda low

probably off his meds and misses the good old days.

the good old burnin-down-your-apartment days

I say fuck with him then. Talk that crazy right back to him.

"What do you want to do to the world Ronald?"


"BURN IT ALL"

a friend suggested i talk really "gay" on the phone

i mean it's been like 10 years, it's plausible

you have the same number from the mid-90's?...I guess it's not that weird, just sayin'

naw, a friend in town gave it to him, unaware of the danger

but what if he hates the gays?

oh wait, but what if he LOVES the gays?

face it dude, you are fucked and in this case that might be literal (if he loves gays he will buttfuck you)

Answer the phone and tell him that you're a relative. Say that you were murdered yesterday. He'll probably just get more depressed that someone beat him to the punch...er, stab.

another call

6:30 in the morning

Sounds like the guy just really really wants attention.

HATER-TOTS!