but i graduated first in my class! at harvard!

then we expect it to be a really great blowjob

Seriously?? Sweet sassy molassy!

fuck no. we're just lost in a mr show skit. i can barely read and i attend a cow college.

Nothing wrong with cow colleges.

I should've known, being something of a Mr Show fan. But I've missed a season or two, as I never had hbo... catching up now.

Still, greasing the wheels with a little below-the-desk action couldn't hurt your chances. I'm just sayin.

hey my mother was a cow! then we had to eat her because my dad got laid off.

we only call it that because it was founded by a cow.

Oh. Fair enough.

Doctor: "Mr. and Mrs. Odenkirk it's simply too late to have an abortion. Your son is 4 years old."


Bob: "Mommy, what's a gagortion?"

Listen to your friend, a person who makes more money than you, is better than you, and therefore beyond criticism. This is called the Worthington Law and it's used to gauge the value of human worth.

Sammy Hagar, the Red Rocker. i love that phrase.

Hey, that's my line.

Best thing about working in an office by yourself: If no one's coming in, you can work hungover in your underwear until you HAVE to get dresses. Plus, when everytime the people you work with (say The Finance Committe of this campaign) see you, you are wearing a smart suit, like today today: gray suit , blue shirt with initials on cuffs,a fine purple and paisley tie, beatle boots, they think you really have your shit together, when in reality all you do is post on internet message baords and answer phones and send emails.

You wear dresses?

I mean, maybe I shouldn't be surprised, because you do have the height to be a really, really good drag-queen, plus, being Southern doesn't necessarily make one a "values" voter (i.e. I believe RuPaul, America's most famous current-day transvestite, is from Savannah), but, still, this news is kind of shocking.

Explain. I don't have time to re-read this whole thing.

Did you get a job?

yeah, i think so. i think that the afternoon beer with the fist in the air should be the international symbol for "one less worry".

so wait you got it? is that what happened? or were you waiting for this lady to tell you your film was ready?

i mean, they called and offered me the position, but i'm hedging my bets in case they pull my internet history and see what a TOTAL AND COMPLETE WINNER i so clearly am not.

but they'll definitely give you points for making fun of...everything i guess. Plus, you curse a lot!

you are so in there. turn it down and tell them your farts are worth more money than they're offering. Then show up wearing an eyepatch.

oh, and congratulations.

Congrats dude.

I didn't realize you were so tall.


<-----6'5 here

that's gotta be something to do with the angle of the camera, because that shit is not the truth.

did you leave work early to have a victory beer? did you even go to work today?

yes and yes, or as close as i ever come.

excellent. you should get hammered and make it a 4 day weekend.